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I pour another shot to detract from the churning in my gut and Ash places his glass next to mine.
‘Go on,’ he says, ‘count me in; we can get a car to take us home.’
I know the gesture is bro code for I’ve got your back when you need me, and I grin my appreciation. ‘You sure?’
‘Positive.’
I load him up and we clink glasses,
throwing it back with a vocal wince.
‘So come on,’ I say, ready for a change in topic, ‘how is married life?’
My shoulders ease as Ash fills me in. I’m accustomed to his loved-up state now and I’m happy for him. I’m happy for them both. They deserve it.
‘Enough about me though...’ He fist bumps my arm. ‘Tell me what’s going on with you. You’ve not been yourself these last few months.’
Not a conversation I’m ready for either.
‘Cat got your tongue...or Cait, rather?’ His eyes sparkle with teasing but whatever he reads in my face has them narrowing sharply. ‘Coco’s right, isn’t she? Something happened between the two of you?’
Hell, are we really that obvious?
‘Something’s happened and you don’t look happy about it, Black. Come on, what gives?’
I blow out a breath. ‘You’re gonna find out sooner or later.’
‘Find out what?’
‘It was one night, that’s all, never going to happen again.’
‘Because you don’t want it to, or because she—’
‘Because neither of us should want it to. I’m no good for her, Ash.’
He surprises me with a laugh. ‘Fuck that, Jackson. You’re one of the most decent blokes I know; if anyone deserves that little firecracker it’s you. Why do you think Coco’s been working so hard to get us all together? Ever since the wedding, it’s been her new priority, only you both keep scuppering every plan she puts in place—Hang on! That’s when it happened, wasn’t it—the wedding?’
I don’t answer and I don’t need to. He’s already piecing it together on his own. ‘That’s why you were walking around like a bear with a sore head the next day, the rest of the trip even.’
And then he’s laughing, a true belly laugh, and I glower at him. ‘What’s so funny?’
‘You! This!’
‘I’m failing to see the funny side.’
‘No? You once took a pop at me for letting a woman get too close and now look at you! Your entire mood for the last few months makes complete sense now. She’s well and truly got hold of you.’
‘I’m so glad it amuses you.’
‘Oh, come on, man!’ He wraps his arm around me and squeezes. ‘This is bloody brilliant news; now all we need to do is bang your heads together and you’ll both realise it too.’
No, we won’t. And if Ash knew the full truth of what went down with Eliza, he’d realise it too. But I can’t tell him. I may have given Damien a black eye, but at least that healed. What they did to me, what Eliza and Damien did, there’s no cure for. I’m fucked up and if I needed any more evidence of that, Coco and Ash’s wedding night delivered it.
I lean out of his embrace. ‘You don’t know what you’re talking about.’
‘What who’s talking about?’
It’s Coco; she’s back. They’re back.
