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“But it is true. The first time, Abe. In over ten years. And what else has changed between us?”
He raised a brow. “Besides four years?”
“It’s been four years again and again. I mean it, Abe. Look, I know I messed up when I buried my head in the sand and didn’t talk to you and managed to no longer ever be home when you were. I take responsibility for ruining our friendship—”
“You can’t do that.”
I stopped. “Why not?”
“Because I did the same thing.”
News to me. “Wait, really? You were avoiding me too?”
“Tamar, you’d just told me you loved me. I was terrified.”
Now I raised my brow. “Thank you. But that’s not the point. The point is that I’m not going to do this. I’m not going to fall in love with you all over again. And I’m not going to ruin, for the second time, our friendship.”
Shock registered on his face. “I don’t want to be friends with you, Tamar. I want you naked on the bed and moaning my name.”
I turned red and hot, but stayed firm as I shook my head. “Well, then we’re at an impasse.”
“No, we’re not.”
I stared at him. Had he missed something? “Yes, we are.”
“Are you dating anyone else?”
I almost wanted to make someone up, just to rub him in Abe’s face. “No.”
He shrugged, looking perfectly content. “Are you going to stop being friends with me now?”
I considered that. As it turned out, I really liked Abe. I didn’t want to lose him all over again. “No.”
“And if I do this—” He leaned forward and slowly brushed my hair away from my face, giving me ample time to move. When I didn’t, he pressed a slow, hot kiss to my lips. Heat inflamed my entire body and curled my toes. “—...Are you going to punch me?”
My breath came quick and my heart was out of control again. “I suppose not,” I said grudgingly.
He leaned back, satisfaction clear in the smile curving his lips. “Then, fine. We’re not dating. But we’re not not dating. We’re at an impasse.”
I let out a huff of air. “I’m still looking for a nice, baggage-free boy to have a relationship with.”
He didn’t look away from me, and the desire and determination in his gaze was overwhelming. “Just try to fall in love with someone else while I’m around.”
The heat that shivered through me made think I might take flight. “That’s not fair. I want to fall in love with someone who’s also falling in love with me.”
He eyes danced. “I know everyone thinks of me as laid-back and easygoing, but I can be just as stubborn as you when I want something.”
“And what?” I said hotly. “You want it to be impossible for me to be happy without you?”
His smile widened. “Sounds about right.”
My mouth fell open, and it took a few moments to summon words. “Mule-headed!”
His brows lifted. “What?”
“It’s beyond mere stubbornness and into horse-donkey hybrid territory.”
His lips twitched and then his eyes flickered slightly, like he was recalling something from the back of his memory. The words rumbled out of him, slow, measured, memorized. “‘You make me laugh and you are so smart and brilliant and gorgeous and every time I look at you I can feel it in my chest’.”
