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Part I
Dirty Beginning
1
Nina
I can’t go after him.
Not because I’m in Italy for only one month, so there is no way anything but a fling could happen between us.
I can’t kiss him.
Not because his lips aren’t kissable. I writhe and ache, imagining what his lips would feel like pressed up against my lips as our tongues tangled together in a passionate kiss.
I can’t think about him.
Not because I should be studying for my exams. I could pass those whether or not I was thinking about ripping his shirt off and running my fingers across every hard inch of him.
I sure as hell can’t sleep with him.
Not because I don’t want to.
Not because he wouldn’t be the most life-altering sex I’d ever had.
Not because he’s out of my league.
Not because he doesn’t want me.
I can’t have Arlo Carini because he’s dangerous. And I’m obsessed.
I can’t keep my eyes off him as Arlo gives me and thirty other grad students a tour of his historic mansion. I can’t keep my heart from racing. Or my mind from thinking dirty thoughts of all the ways and places we could have sex in this mansion.
On the couch in the sitting room, on the grand staircase, against the stone wall in the foyer.
I can’t stop the obsession once it starts. And, right now, I’m full-on obsessed as he guides us through more and more rooms, the whole time ignoring everyone else and staring directly at me. It’s clear that he might be a little obsessed or at least curious about me, which only makes me crazier.
I can’t do this. I’m not really obsessed. Just infatuated. He’s just a hot guy that I want to fuck. The same thought that every other woman here is thinking.
Arlo leads us outside and I try to do my best to focus on other things. That’s what my years of therapy has taught me; distraction is key. I focus on the blooming flowers that are so large that they would hold my interest if this were any other time. Just not when there is one of the hottest warm-blooded males I’ve ever seen standing only a few feet away from me.
I try listening to the birds. I try focusing on the beautiful statues and fountains. I try ogling the men in my class but they all look like boys compared to Arlo.
Nothing works.
I just have to get through this and then I’ll find a nice Italian man to distract me tonight. I just haven’t had sex in a while. That’s it.
The class starts walking again. So I do too. But when I take a step I feel nothing beneath my foot.
