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Maybe, it’s where I belong. Maybe, I could be accepted for all that I am, if I only had the courage to try.
I shake my head at the striking woman in the mirror. I’m not ready. I just can’t go out to some big scene looking for a woman to marry or to buy… I wouldn’t even know where to start.
I grab my purse and head out the door. I need to get out and let loose a bit, even if I’m not adventurous enough to do something really different. The Nook has always made me feel safe and accepted. That’s what I need right now, a bit of comfort that I’m perfectly okay the way I am and there are others just like me.
Plenty of the girls who go there are hiding their kink from family members or close friends. That’s exactly why Rachel started the Nook in the first place and hid it under her bookstore. So that everyone had a safe place to express themselves and do it discreetly.
Even though I hit the street with my face composed, I still feel like screaming. My hands shake a little as I call the taxi. Feeling this much emotion is
so rare for me that I might scurry back to my comfort zone with a huge tub of ice cream and forget the deal, the magazine and a potential partner.
But then nothing would change at all. Feeling determination streak through me, I get in the cab with purpose and control.
I’m doing this. Maybe the fact that I’m getting emotional is a good thing.
Maybe this is what it means to not be boring.
Four
Roxy
I wandered around for ages looking for some action. I wasn’t just looking for a spot to party, I was hoping to hook up with someone who could give me somewhere to crash.
The usual spots just ran me into heaps of guys. Like, seriously, what the fuck? Saying ‘yeah, sorry, I’m into girls’ doesn’t even slow them down. I just don’t get it.
Everyone I struck up a conversation with told me about cool parties or clubs, but some of them were way too upscale—seriously, in my outfit, I’d never get in—and some were way too low, even for me. Others were just jam packed with horny guys letting girls in for free to balance out the sausage fest.
So, I ended up heading back to the Cozy Nook. A bit plain and boring was better than sliding into a dark nest of predatory man beasts. At least I had been able to tell in my one brief visit, this place was totally girl friendly.
I wasn’t convinced they were into the kink scene, but there was only one way to find out.
When I got there, it was already dark, and I wondered what the protocol was. Secret entrance? Password? Kooky knock?
Luckily the one girl I had seen that looked anything close to cool was at the door when I rocked up. She waved at me, grinning.
“Hey, I saw you before, didn’t I? Did Rachel invite you back?”
“Well. I think ‘invite’ might not be the right word.”
I waited for her reaction. People responded to me in a few ways and firing some saucy sarcasm at them usually sorted friend from foe pretty quick.
To my relief, she giggles.
“I’m Cody.” She sticks her hand out confidently.
“I’m Roxy.” I smile back, thinking she really did seem fun. Maybe this place wouldn’t be a total waste of time, after all.
“Why don’t you come on down? If Rachel invited you, it should be cool.”
“Well.” I look around the shadowed store as we slipped inside, Cody shutting the door behind us.
“As I said. I don’t think I was exactly invited but let’s give it a go.”
Cody just laughs and leads me down some stairs. I can hear music and see low lights. Nothing like a laser or strobe show though. If they are drinking tea down there, I don’t think I’ll be able to cope.
I almost collapse with relief when I finally hit the floor. There’s a bar, a really nice one too. There are some nice, flashy lights but its more atmosphere than blinding and I find I kind of like it. There’s a little stage thing with some sound equipment but it doesn’t look like there’s a band.
But what I do see… Is girls, girls, girls. Not a man in sight. Pretty ladies everywhere and they are dressed hot.
