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With every step we took, my throat grew drier. What was I doing? These people didn’t want to meet me. They wanted my kidney. Why was I putting them through all of this, when we would probably never hear from each other again afterward?
“Here we are,” the hostess said as we reached a corner table set for six. The first face I saw was Susan’s, and I felt oddly relieved to see her. We’d already met, so she could be the intermediary between me and her sister and mom.
The other two women at the table turned to look up at us. Molly hadn’t yet lost the roundness of teendom; when she smiled, the apples of her cheeks were full and rosy. She shared the same tan skin as Susan, but her hair had a purple sheen to it. Square black-rimmed hipster glasses rested on her nose, and a glare partially hid her dark eyes. She bolted from her seat and threw her arms around me, crying, “Sophie!” as though we’d known each other all our lives. Her long, thin arms were banded with a mish-mash of bracelets that ranged from black cording with metal charms to braided string and metal bangles.
Caught off-guard, I hugged her back, trying not to notice the guarded expressions of Susan and her mother. “It’s nice to finally meet you.”
Neil extended his hand to their mother. “Neil Elwood. Pleasure to meet you.”
“Sasha Tangen.” The older woman took his hand briefly, her eyes flicking back to me as I stepped away from Molly. Sasha shook her head and looked down. “I’m sorry. I just wasn’t prepared… You look so much like him.”
A lump stuck in my throat.
“Susan,” Neil said, shaking her hand before pulling out a chair for me. But my feet were stuck to the ground.
“Did you see the pool?” Molly asked, either oblivious to or trying to ignore the tension. “It’s kidney-shaped.”
I laughed with her, but I wasn’t entirely sure I wouldn’t vomit on the table. Before I took my seat, I reached for Sasha’s hand. “Hi. I’m Sophie Scaife.”
“I appreciate you being here,” Sasha said, some of the shock on her face easing. “I know it’s a long trip.”
“This place is so cool,” Molly cut in. “The bathroom mirror has Bluetooth. You can hook it up to your phone. Like, so it can sing to you.”
“So, the accommodations are—” Neil began, only to have Susan cut him off.
“It’s too much. Really. You didn’t have to do this,” she said quietly.
“It’s our pleasure,” I said firmly. “I want you guys to be comfortable. And if you don’t like it here, we can pick somewhere else when we come for the actual…”
For the surgery. Which I didn’t want to think about. We still didn’t know if I was a suitable match. Our blood types were compatible, but there was so much more to it that I had no idea about going in. I’d had another blood test, urine tests to make sure my kidneys were functioning, something about cross-matching… The past few weeks had been nonstop, and it might have been all for nothing.
“Really, everything you’ve done and offered to do is…” Sasha shook her head. “We are very grateful.”
The last part was directed somewhat firmly at Susan.
“We haven’t checked in, yet,” Neil said, eager to keep the small talk going. “But I do look forward to the singing mirror.”
Molly’s eyes sparkled with admiration. Then, she said, “You’re like…way old.”
“Molly!” Sasha snapped.
“No, I meant, like, way older than Sophie.” Molly gestured to me. “I know you’re twenty-eight, so you’re way old, too—”
“Molly, stop talking,” Susan said through gritted teeth.
I laughed, relieved to be back in familiar territory. “It’s not a big deal. We get that all the time.”
“Well, I don’t get it all the time, because I’m not ‘way old’, as you put it,” Neil told Molly. “But, yes, I’m much older than your sister.”
The word was out there. Oh, my god, it was out there, and there was no putting it back in. I thought of all the things Susan and I had talked about, how we weren’t sure how to go forward. I knew we couldn’t go backward. And Molly looked so pleased. What would happen if she wanted a relationship we just couldn’t have? Would I hurt her the way Joey Tangen had hurt me?
“You’re retired, I hear?” Sasha asked, and I wondered how much Susan had filled her in on. She hadn’t looked surprised to see a middle-aged husband accompanying me.
Neil reached for the glass of water sweating on the tablecloth. “Yes. Before Sophie and I married.”
“I didn’t think businessmen retired. I thought you just ran for president,” Sasha said, with a smile that indicated friendly teasing. It was immediately apparent that, of the three, Susan was the more reserved.
It may not have made her a particularly warm ambassador for her family, but it meant she was cautious, and I appreciated that.
