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I ran a hand over the dashboard with a gentle smile. “It feels really damn good, not just to have something that’s mine but to know that I paid for it. That I could actually afford to pay for it. Cash money.”
“I’m happy for you, Madds.”
“Thanks, Jamie.” It took about twenty minutes before we arrived at one of the smaller casinos on the outskirts of the tri-city area, but I was happy with the choice.
“I didn’t even know places like this still existed!” It was total old school Las Vegas with a dinner and a show, waitresses dressed up in sexy little tuxedos, offering up everything from loose cigarettes to cocktails and appetizers. It was the perfect backdrop for this date, my first grownup first date.
“It’s not too much? Too cheesy?”
I shrugged. “I love cheese.”
“Good to know,” he said around a chuckle and guided me to our table. A half circle booth with high backs for extra privacy without impeding our view of the show on stage. “How was your week?”
“It was good, mostly uneventful. Except for one thing.” I couldn’t deny that I was bursting to share my news with Jameson because he, of all people, knew how important this was to me.
“And a date with me is why you’re bouncing in your seat?”
I froze at his words and laughed. “Actually, yes. That’s part of it, I mean you do look pretty hot tonight. But that’s not the only reason.”
He waited, amusement tickling his smile while I gathered up the courage to say out loud my news. “Calvin may have found Molly. Well, I haven’t officially seen her, but he gave me the information on her new identity, Polly Bennett, and that’s almost the same thing. She’s up in Reno. I’m going to drive up there tomorrow. How cool is that?”
“Pretty fucking cool,” he agreed with a crooked smile that I felt all the way down to my toes. “You know if you wait until the weekend, I can go with you.”
I sighed. He was right. “It’s just, I mean…she has a new name, so that means she’s safe, right? Out of the clutches of the sex traffickers? And with Mueller and the Crusaders gone, she should be okay, right? I just need to get up there and find her. I do wonder why she hasn’t attempted to reach out to me. Not that she’d know where to reach out to. I gave that waitress lady my number to give to her, but if Molly moved up to Reno, I’m not sure that lady would have seen her after I left.”
I hated that ideas like that were invading my mind when I should be floating on a cloud, not injecting self-doubt in my heart.
“Maybe she doesn’t know it. Maybe she’s still afraid for you, Madds. Who’s to say she knows Mueller’s dead?”
“How could she not know? It’s been all over the news.” Another thought hit me. What if Molly hadn’t left San Bernardino just to get away from Mom and her latest boyfriend du jour? What if she’d been trying to get away from me, too?
“Never mind. I’m done obsessing about it. Let’s just enjoy our evening.”
“You think she ran away from you, too.”
I blinked. Was he reading my thoughts now?
“No, no I don’t.” That was a little too much realism on a night when I wanted the fantasy.
“You do, and that’s okay, Maddie. You’re allowed to have feelings about this.”
“I don’t want to have feelings about this, Jamie. I want to find Molly, and I’ve spent more than a year searching for her. Only now, when I’m so close, did it even occur to me that maybe she just doesn’t want to be found. Not by me, anyway.”
“Look at me, Madds.” I shook my head, and he reached over and grabbed my chin to force my gaze to his. “Remember what she’s been through. She was almost certainly trafficked and everything that goes along with that. Maybe she’s embarrassed or ashamed. Maybe she doesn’t want you to see how she is right now. I saw Savannah when Charlie rescued her, and that shit wasn’t pretty.”
“So don’t give up?”
“I can’t tell you what to do, but the woman I know isn’t a quitter.”
“No? What is she?” My question was playful and flirtatious because, goddammit, this was a date, not a fucking therapy session.
“She’s strong and sexy,” he said and circled a thumb around my shoulder. “She’s tough as fucking nails, funny and sweet.” His fingertip slid across my collarbone in a slow, dragging, back and forth movement. “She’s hotter than she knows.”
“Wow. She’s all that? Sounds pretty amazing.”
I don’t think anyone in the world, not even Molly, thought all those great things about me. It was intoxicating. Like I mattered. For the first time in my life, I mattered to someone.
