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“Pl-please—” It’s all he can manage to say before I hit him again. Again. Every time my fist makes contact, a rush of pleasure runs through me. I can’t stop myself, and I don’t want to. Soon, he’s unconscious, limp underneath me.
But I can’t stop. I hit him until his face is nothing but jelly. Until nothing about him looks remotely human. By the time I get tired and stop, I’m breathing heavily, but he isn’t breathing at all. There’s blood all over the kitchen, all over me.
I’ve never felt like this. Victorious. A lion defending his mate. Before getting up, I spit on him—sick bastard. I don’t know how he found out where she lives; he might’ve followed her home that night when I first took her away from him. Now I’m glad I didn’t have him killed. I had the pleasure of doing it myself.
I wash my hands in the sink before calling Alexei. “There’s a mess at Rowan’s that needs cleaning.” With that, I go to her room, then open the closet door.
She’s sitting in the corner with her knees against her chest, hands over her ears, eyes closed. It’s enough to break my heart. I’ll make sure she’s never in this position again. “Rowan? Everything’s fine now. You’re safe.”
She scrambles to her feet and throws her arms around me despite the blood on my shirt. “What happened? Are you hurt?”
“It’s not my blood.” She stiffens in my arms but doesn’t pull away.
“Whose is it? Who’s out there?”
“It doesn’t matter now. Come on. I’m going to take you home.” She lifts her head, eyes searching mine. “My home. Where you’ll be safe. Close your eyes, and I’ll get you out of here.” She buries her head in my chest and lets me lead her out of the room, then out of the apartment. I manage to spare her the sight of the corpse in her kitchen.
We wait in the car until Alexei arrives. I didn’t want to leave without knowing he got there. I have a short exchange with him, describing what he’ll find inside, and from there, I know he can handle things with no further instruction. Nothing matters as much as getting her away from here, keeping her from all of this.
“I can’t believe it. If you hadn’t been there…” She’s shaking, holding on to my arm as I drive. “I don’t know what I would’ve done without you.”
“Don’t think about it. You’re safe now. Nobody will ever hurt you as long as I’m around.”
“You killed him.” It isn’t a question.
She deserves the truth. “I killed him.”
Her silence leaves me wondering how she feels, but I won’t push her on it. She might need time to process. Not much time, as it turns out. “I was so scared back there. Terrified. Not just for me, either. I was afraid for you.”
“You never have to worry about me. I can handle myself.”
“Still. I was. I wanted to go out there and help you. I thought, what will I do if anything happens to Lucian? Especially knowing you were defending me. I wouldn’t want to live with myself if you didn’t make it out of that.”
“But I did, Rowan.” When it doesn’t seem like that makes her feel better, I pull the car over and turn to her, pulling her close. “I’m okay. So are you. There’s nothing to be afraid of now.”
“There’s everything to be afraid of!” She bursts into violent sobs that shake her entire body. “I don’t feel safe anywhere. Only when I’m with you. I should be afraid of you after what you did, but all I want is to be with you always because I’m safe with you. I don’t know what to think anymore.”
I pull her away from my chest and take her face in my hands. Hands I used only minutes ago to kill for her. “Listen to me. If you want, you don’t ever have to be afraid again. It doesn’t have to be the way it was before. It can be you and me. No arrangements, no encounters. And I swear, I’ll do my best to be a better man for you.”
Her sobs have quieted into sniffles. “Really?” she whispers, and the hope in it both thrills and humbles me. The most precious, valuable thing in the world, and all she wants is to know I mean what I say.
“Really. I’ll do whatever it takes, so long as you’re willing to give me another chance.”
Her head bobs up and down. “I want that.” Anything else she might’ve wanted to say is muffled when I cover her mouth with mine, taking the kiss I’ve craved over the endless days we’ve been apart. She’ll never know what a gift she just gave me.
I plan to show her, though—every single day from now on.
