AllFreeNovel
Share Us
That comment abruptly cut short Helena's enjoyment of her aunt's enthusiasm. If Aunt Lillian were planning her presentation as a prelude to a bridal, Helena had better put a period to that notion immedi ately.
"I shall delight in wishing both Darnell and Charis happy. But, Aunt Lillian, I have no intention of marrying. Not this Season.
Not ever."
In the silence after her pronouncement, all three Darnells turned to stare at her.
"Did Darnell not tell you?" Helena demanded. "I informed him at our very first meeting that I intended eventually to set up my own household. Dear as you all have become to me, that intention is unchanged."
Recovering from her chagrin, Lady Darnell said, "I-— I suppose I can understand that your.. .unfortunate upbringing may have given you a wariness about
144THE UNTAMED HEIRESS
gentlemen, but when the right one appears, you will change—
"
"It did and I won't," Helena interrupted, determined to exterminate any hope her aunt might try to salvage on the matter of matrimony. "I'm sorry, Aunt Lillian, but I am absolutely adamant."
Suddenly realizing that her implacable opposition to wedlock might make her appear even odder than her not-of-the-prevailing-fashion gowns, she reluctantly added, "If my desire to remain
unmarried will embar rass you or the family, perhaps I should begin looking for another residence at once."
To her relief, both Lady Darnell and Charis immedi ately protested. After promising they would respect her wishes but still earnestly desired her to remain with them and participate in Charis's Season, she acquiesced and the discussion turned back to the dinner this eve ning.
Lord Darnell, however, Helena noted, said nothing.
After avoiding looking again in her direction, he finished his coffee, bowed to the ladies and quit the room.
Something of the morning's brightness left with him.
Still, with him gone, before the ladies parted for their morning activities she could question them about those odd feelings Lord Darnell generated in her.
"Aunt Lillian, what does it signify when a man gazes at a lady intently?"
Lady Darnell set down her teacup and chuckled. "You must have been reading Charis's novels! In your 145
case, I expect it would mean the gentleman was admiring your fine eyes—and lovely they are!"
"What if he were staring at my.. .person," she elaborated, substituting at the last moment that more innocuous term for
breasts.
Lady Darnell's pleased look faded. Her brow furrowed, she exchanged a glance with Charis and then replied, "Your.. .person?
Do you mean some man has been.. .ogling you?"
Before Helena could answer, her aunt's eyes widened and she wailed, "That trip from Cornwall all alone! Oh, I feared you might have suffered indignities, traveling so far without even a maid to lend you consequence! Did some man make offensive overtures? And that short gown! The sight of your bare ankles must have i nflamed him!"
"My bare ankles might...inflame someone?" Indeed, her own odd feelings in Darnell's presence had been accompanied by a profound sense of warmth. "With what kind of heat?"
Looking even more distressed, Lady Darnell said, "It could mean the man has a desire to.. .to touch you, a dangerous offense which one must be ever vigilant to prevent, which is why unmarried young ladies do not venture anywhere without at least a maid to protect their virtue."
Another thought occurred and Helena frowned, unable to reconcile her aunt's differing advice. "You say that the sight of my naked ankles might engender dangerous heat in a man. But did you not urge me to order go wns that would reveal my chest and shoulders? Would not baring those more intimate parts elicit even more undesirable heat?"
"Well, I suppose," her aunt allowed, "but 'tis not undesirable to incite warmth in a proper gentleman."
"A ton gentlemen, you mean? It is permissible for that sort of man to give me heated glances?" Helena asked, trying to discern
exactly what was considered proper.
"Yes. No! That is, it is quite acceptable to display, only before true gentleman who are well-bred enough not to attempt to take liberties, a.. .a physical loveliness that excites the sort of admiration that would encour age that gentleman to court you for his wife."
Finally Helena made the connection. "Ah, so a gentleman who stares in that way desires me for breeding."
"Helena!" Lady Darnell cried, fanning herself. "You must never say such a thing! Oh, Charis, where are my smelling salts?"
While Helena stood, dismayed at the havoc her simple question had created, Charis found the vineagrette and waved it under Lady Darnell's nose. "Calm yourself, dear ma'am! Let me assist you to your room."
"Aunt Lillian, I am so sorry!" Helena cried.
Moaning, fingers to her temples, Lady Darnell did not reply.
Over her stepmother's shoulder as she led her away, Charis said softly, "She will be fine after she's rested. I'll come back in a trice and try to explain."
As there seemed nothing else to do, Helena waited for Charis to return, feeling both guilty and exasperated. No wonder Lord Darnell had not wanted to discuss this before his stepmother. It seemed Society had compli- 147
cated rules to govern what nature handled much more directly.
A few minutes later Charis appeared. Waving aside Helena's apology, she said, "Bellemère's nerves are easily overset—only recall the afternoon of your arrival! I expect that answering your question must seem to you quite straightforward, but as I suppose you've surmised, 'tis a matter of great delicacy generally not mentioned in Society. Usually a girl's mama tells her how to properly elicit and respond to a gentleman's... interest, but I expect you never received such instruction."
"Will it distress you to explain?"
Charis smiled ruefully. "I can share the little I know, but girls aren't told a great deal. I learned more watching the horses at Clay gate Manor than my mother ever divulged! Gentlemen, of course, know more, but—"
"One cannot ask them," Helena finished.
Charis laughed. "Exactly! They seem to...desire women, an impulse, from what I've gathered, akin to what stallions feel for mares. Tis apparently a very strong impulse, for girls are warned never to be caught alone with an unrelated man unless they are betrothed. If some man has directed lustful glances at you, tell Adam. Now that you are living with us, 'tis his responsibility to protect you."
It hardly seemed politic to reveal that 'twas Lord Darnell with whom she had exchanged the lustful glances. "Am I in danger from such a man?"
"This part is more complicated," Charis admitted. '"Tis acceptable to excite a gentleman's desire, for he knows he may not act upon his impulses unless he pledges to wed the lady who arouses them. It would be dangerous to elicit desire in a man not of your class, for whatever his intentions, you could not marry
him. Fathers or brothers guard their female relations from men such as that."
"Then men must suffer these feelings of desire until they marry? It sounds most.. .uncomfortable."
"Well, there is a class of women who...who earn their living by satisfying men's desires." Charis's cheeks, already pink, reddened further.
Fascinated, Helena said, "Do you know such women?"
"Heavens, no!" Charis replied with a giggle. '"Twould be most improper! A gently bred lady is not supposed to know such creatures exist. If you should notice one riding in the park or at the opera, you must pretend you haven't seen her, even if she is quite obvious."
Shaking her head at such willful ignorance, Helena said, "So it is permissible for a gentleman to gaze at you with desire—or for you to desire him, if you are to marry?"
Putting a hand to her hot cheeks, Charis gamely replied, "Yes, though 'tis quite brazen to admit it! An engaged couple is permitted to kiss and embrace, which sounds quite delightful.
Brazen or not, I want the man I marry to desire me, not some grasping hussy in an opera box. But of course, a young lady must never—"
149
"Speak of it," Helena finished wryly. "No wonder poor Aunt Lillian was so distressed! Thank you, Chads, for daring to enlighten me. Now, do you suppose Aunt Lillian is calm enough
that I may go beg her pardon?"
"Yes, let us go up," Charis agreed, looking relieved to be done discussing so obviously embarrassing a subject.
How was a woman to know how to respond to desire, Helena wondered as they climbed the stairs, if she was never to speak of it—not even to the man who desired her, or whom she in turn desired? It seemed a stupid sort of reticence that must surely lead to misunderstanding.
And how did a man mate with a woman? With the wild intensity of a stallion with a mare? Just thinking of Adam Darnell mounting her, his hands on her breasts, his teeth at her neck, set her blood coursing and sent a tingling warmth to her breasts, between her legs. She could well believe, as Charis had timidly confirmed, that a woman wanted a man to desire her.
Must a lady be wed to slake her desires? Obviously it was not required for men to be, since women existed to serve that sole purpose. Was desire elicited only by one particular person? A stallion, she knew, would mate with any willing mare. Were men and woman like horses in this?
