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“I’m still not entirely sure,” Schuyler said. “All I know is that he’s gone, and I don’t think he’s ever coming back.”
“I lost my husband too,” Decca said, reaching out to again clasp Schuyler’s hand. “I understand that feeling of loss, that sense that a part of you has been physically taken away. That you’re diminished, less than you once were.”
“That’s exactly it,” Schuyler said. “There’s something missing in me now, and I don’t know if I’ll ever get it back.”
“You’re young,” Decca said. “I know that’s what people say, and it seems impossible now, but your heart will mend, and perhaps in the future…”
But Schuyler wasn’t ready to think about what her life could be like after Jack. And she had far more important concerns than herself; although the thought of Jack really and truly being gone forever was too much, and she found herself starting to cry again. Get it together, she thought.
“I can see that it’s too soon for you to think about it,” Decca said. “I understand—even at my age I have friends who try to arrange dates for me. I don’t have the heart to tell them I’m not ready and I may never be, though it’s been years.”
“But you have other family,” Schuyler said. “Your granddaughter…”
“Yes, Finn!” Decca brightened. “You really must meet her. She’ll be so thrilled to hear that she has a sister.”
Schuyler hoped that would turn out to be true, but she could easily imagine a reality in which it wasn’t.
“Do you have other children?” Schuyler asked.
“No, I’m afraid Bendix was our only child,” Decca said. “Of course we tried, for years and years, but we didn’t have all the marvelous technological advances you young people have these days. If you couldn’t manage it naturally, there was only so much the doctors could do.
“It’s a blessing that we’ve found each other, isn’t it?” Decca said. “Where are you staying? I insist that you move your things here and stay with me for a while, if you’re not otherwise occupied.”
“I wish that I could,” Schuyler said, and she really meant it. “But…” She had no idea how to explain why she couldn’t stay. She’d have to come up with something. “Some friends of mine are in trouble. I’m in the middle of helping them out—I came down here to help—and I need to get back to them.”
“I see,” Decca said, clearly disappointed. “Well, I won’t keep you, then.”
“No, it’s not like that!” Schuyler said. “I want to stay, really I do. And I hope that if you’ll have me, I can come back someday.”
Decca smiled. “Of course you can. You do what you need to do. I’ll be here when you return.”
“There’s just one more thing I have to ask before I go,” Schuyler said.
“About your father?”
Schuyler nodded.
“I figured you would,” Decca said.
“He did come back to you, eventually, didn’t he?” Schuyler said.
“Yes, he did.” She smiled sadly.
“I need to find him. Do you know where he is?”
“I do,” Decca said, giving her a con
cerned look.
“Where is he?”
“He’s here.”
TWENTY-EIGHT
Mimi
he journey aboveground was lonelier this time. The train ride through the bleak landscape of rock and cinder seemed endless without Jack to keep her company; all Mimi could think about was how she was going to get out of this one. The emerald stone hung heavy around her neck. Lucifer’s Bane. The burden she carried, Lucifer’s wrath, unleashed upon everyone she loved. She and Jack had not fooled him for one moment. Truly, they were the fools.
