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Gramma gave her the look that said, ‘Do I look like a fool?’ but said nothing.
“What? I just don’t feel like going out!” Farren cried defensively.
“Does this have anything to do with a guy?” Gramma asked.
“Why would you think that? Nothing is wrong, Gramma. Is it so wrong to want to just spend a Friday evening at home being lazy and enjoying your company?”
“Okay,” Gramma said. “I won’t pry, but you know you can talk to me about anything.”
She looked Farren straight in the eyes, driving her point home that she meant what she said, but Farren already knew she could tell her Gramma anything. She always had. That wasn’t the problem.
The problem was, she couldn’t tell anyone, because admitting it out loud would make it all real. She’d started off with more than just a mild attraction to the hot, older man who hired her, spent a magical night together with him in a beautiful, foreign country, and now her heart was paying the consequences.
“I’ll tell you one more thing, and then I’ll let it rest,” Gramma told her, bringing her out of her reverie.
Farren released a slow breath and said, “Okay, let me have it.”
Gramma stood from her recliner, walked the few steps over to Farren, and took her by the hand. “No one can control the wind,” she began, and then leaned down to eye level. “But you can always adjust the sail.”
At that, she patted the back of Farren’s hand and started walking out of the living room, toward the hallway to their bedrooms. “I’m going to soak in a bath if you need me.”
“Thanks,” Farren said under her breath, since Gramma had already disappeared down the hall.
She thought about what Gramma had said for a minute and wondered what it meant. Not literally, but how she could apply it to her current circumstances.
She grabbed her phone and sent a text message to Shea. Anything going on tonight?
Shea replied immediately. Hitting up a party. Want to go? I’ll come get you!
Farren stared at the phone for a moment. Going to a party was the last thing she really felt like doing tonight. She replied. Yes I’ll go.
She set her phone down beside her and covered her face with both hands. She was so not looking forward to this, but damn-it, she was going to get Rogan Rayner out of her system if it was the last thing she did. She stood and ran to her bedroom to get ready.
FIFTEEN
“Here, have a beer!” Shea yelled to Farren over the blaring music, handing her a red, plastic cup with foam spilling over the top.
She took the sticky cup from Shea and brought it up to her mouth. She caught a whiff of the bitter liquid before it touched her lips, and it made her stomach turn, so she decided to wait a minute before she took her first sip.
“Thanks!” Farren yelled back. “Some party.”
“Yeah, it’s okay. Last week at Jenna’s was better. You should’ve come to that one!”
Farren smiled at her friend, pretty sure she hadn’t really missed much, but she wasn’t going to mention it. It was just nice to see her and get out of the house for a change.
“There’s Devin! I’m going to go talk to him. Come with me?” Shea offered.
“You go ahead and talk to Loverboy! I’ll just be right here.” She pointed to the floor beneath her feet in case her voice hadn’t carried as well as she’d hoped.
She gave Shea a playful shove in Devin’s direction and stood looking around the crowded room as people danced, talked, and drank. Everyone seemed to be having such a good time. She could surely get into it, too.
Her eyes scanned the room and caught on a tall guy with dark hair in a cut she was all too familiar with, or had been up until a few months ago. Paul had just walked in with a pretty blonde clinging to him like flies on stink.
Great, she thought, just who she wanted to see tonight. She wondered if it should bother her that her ex-boyfriend was there with another girl, and maybe she was a little surprised at just how much it didn’t bother her. No, instead, it had just made her think of Rogan, and how he had almost, dare she say, consoled her the day that Paul had broken up with her outside of Charlie’s Bar.
She blew out a huff of air and made her way to Shea and Devin. She may not have cared to see Paul with someone else, but she didn’t want him seeing her there without anyone at all, either.
It didn’t take long, though, for Paul to seek her out once he heard she was there. She, Shea, and Devin had migrated out into the back yard to give their ears a break from the deafening music inside the house. They stood next to an outdoor fire pit that lit up the night around them and kept them warm in the cold, night air. Paul came waltzing outside, having left his leach, er, girlfriend somewhere indoors.
