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He jumped on that. “You see? You can’t tell me you’re happier now without me, Grace. Before you found out about Maureen, we were happy.”
Grace glanced down at their joined hands, feeling oddly guilty about what she was about to say.
“I wasn’t unhappy,” she said, finally, forcing herself to meet his eyes.
“Right. That’s what I just said.”
Bless him. “No, you said I was happy with you. And I’m not entirely sure that was true toward the end. I think we were just comfortable.”
“And you’re sure that’s not just pride talking?”
“Maybe,” she said with a shrug. “But my point is, even if I could forgive you … even if I could learn to trust you again … I don’t know that I want that.”
“That’s your anger talking.”
Her eyes narrowed. “You know, I’ve actually gotten over my anger, but the more you keep telling me how I’m supposed to be feeling, the ‘mad’ seems like it might be on its way back.”
“I’m doing this wrong,” he said, dipping his head. “I thought … I hoped that you’d have missed me the way I’ve missed you. I’ve stayed away for weeks, knowing I should let you go. Knowing I can’t possibly deserve you …”
Grace sucked in a breath when he looked up, because his eyes looked suspiciously shiny. And even though a small part of her sort of wanted to dismember this man for the pain he’d caused, the other part of her cared about who he’d been once. Who they’d once been.
But she’d meant it when she told him she couldn’t go back. Even i
f she could somehow forget about those damned red panties, a lifetime with Greg was no longer as appealing as it once was.
She didn’t know what had changed, but …
Bullshit.
She sat up a little straighter, because 2.0 was back.
You know exactly what’s changed. And he’s currently waiting for you with cold Chinese food.
Grace squeezed her eyes shut. She knew 2.0 was right. She couldn’t be with Greg, and not because of Maureen.
Because of Jake.
Jake, who’d shown her what it was to laugh and live and eat chocolate at 8:00 a.m. if she wanted to, and have a glass of wine at 1:00 p.m. if she wanted that too.
He’d shown her that sex wasn’t simply a take-it-or-leave-it bedtime ritual, and that making out in a cramped car could be magical, and that weekdays only had to be boring and routine if you let them be.
Jake was …
Everything.
He’s also going to peace out as soon as you’re done with this article, 2.0 taunted. He’s all that and a bag of chips now, but what happens three months from now when you’re all alone and back to writing tepid stories about horoscopes?
Grace nearly rolled her eyes. Awesome—2.0 was going bipolar on her. Hadn’t 2.0 been on Jake’s side just seconds ago?
But she was right.
Jake was not a long-term investment. Jake was like chocolate. Really freaking good in the moment, but best as a treat to be sneaked here and there.
Grace couldn’t live on chocolate.
She needed …
Her eyes fell on Greg. Greg was like carrots. Nobody’s favorite food, but not a horrible choice to survive on for a lifetime.
