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“I’m always here if you need me. Just remember, that life is unpredictable even if you think you’re on the right track.”
***
I smile when I see Evan approach me in the café.
After my discussion with Gabi yesterday, I saw Rocco for dinner. I’d bailed on our pizza date so I thought I’d invite him out for a burger to catch up.
I needed the sibling bonding time and when he asked about Evan, I reiterated what I told Gabi but with much less graphic detail.
Rocco understood that it’s casual and he encouraged me to keep doing whatever felt right for me.
Since I value his opinion more than anyone else’s, I went to sleep last night feeling at peace with where my life is headed, both professionally and now, personally.
“Chloe, we need to talk.” Evan stops short of where I’m standing.
I look him over. He’s dressed differently today. He’s wearing dark slacks and a white button down shirt under a dark blue blazer.
It’s still cold outside so I’m surprised that he isn’t wearing his wool coat.
I doubt that he’s here to break up with me since we’re not officially anything but people who meet for a good time.
“What do you want to talk about?” I take a small sip of my tea. “Do you want to grab a coffee first? The line is short right now.”
He looks toward the counter where two baristas are busy stacking cups. “No. I’m not having a coffee.”
The nervous energy that is bouncing off of him is palpable. I feel my stomach flip-flop. “What is it?”
He grabs me by the elbow to lead me over to a vacant table near the door. I don’t have time to sit, but I do because it’s obvious that this discussion isn’t going to be short and sweet.
“I need to ask you something personal.” He rubs his temples with his fingers. “I’m sorry I have to do this, but I haven’t slept all night and I’m not the kind of guy who sees value in beating around the bush.”
I rest my tea on the table when I realize that I’m shaking. “All right. I’ll try and answer.”
He closes his eyes before they pop open and lock with mine. “Are you late?”
I breathe a sigh of relief. “I have another five minutes before I need…”
“No,” he blurts out. “I don’t mean today. Are you late?”
I suck in a deep breath. “Am I late?”
He rests both hands together in the middle of the table. “Chloe, I am asking if you’ve missed your period.”
I hang my head. Why the hell would he ask me that? Why?
“Chloe, I need to know. The condom might have broken that first night. I found out yesterday from the guy I got it from that the package was years old. It might have failed and if you’re late we need to talk about options.”
Options? I wish I had options . I’ve longed for options for years but some of us don’t have the luxury of options .
“I know you must be in shock,” he goes on. “If we have to deal with a pregnancy, I’ll help. I’ll be there to discuss what is best for us both.”
Tears sting the corner of my eyes. I shake my head from side-to-side wishing he would shut up.
“Say something,” he pleads. “You can scream at me all you want but say something. Are you on the pill? Is your period late? Is there any chance that I knocked you up?”
I finally look up and into his face. I see nothing but panic and fear.
“There’s no chance,” I answer softly. “You didn’t knock me up.”
