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He stretched out on the bed as much as he could, seeing it was designed for a person half his size. He’d told Aine he could sleep if he was near her, but only because then she’d let herself do the same. He couldn’t, though. He bent his elbow and rested his head on his hand, watching her.
The same indecision warred inside him. Was he right to have told her the real reason he ended their relationship? It wasn’t as though anything had changed. And if he did go ahead with genetic testing and it turned out he did have the variations his sister had, what then?
He never thought of himself as a selfish man, but when it came to Aine, he wanted to be. He wanted to let illness and disorders and inabilities to have children be damned, and spend his life with her.
Imagining what that would be like, he rested his head on the pillow and let himself sleep.
20
Aine held her breath, hoping she could will the nurse away who would soon walk through the door and wake Griffin. She knew the minute his eyes opened, his face would close on the peace and serenity he exhibited only when he slept.
Instead of nightmares, his dreams this morning must be filled with the light and love he’d never allow himself to accept when the sun rose on the day ahead.
She loved the man sleeping in the too-small bed by her side. Nothing would change the way she felt, even if he remained intransigent in his determination to do what he believed was best for her rather than what was best for her heart.
Instead of being jarred awake by an overzealous hospital employee anxious to complete the first of her daily tasks, Griffin’s eyes opened slowly and settled on hers.
“Good morning,” he murmured, shielding his eyes from the stream of sunlight illuminating the room.
She smiled. “Good morning.”
He smiled too. “I’d give
anything to know what you’re thinking.”
“Trying to keep the day at bay.”
He turned to his side and propped himself up on his elbow. “What are you worried about?”
“I don’t know where to begin.”
He sat up then and reached out for her hand. “I’m sorry, sweetheart.”
Unexpected tears filled her eyes. He had no idea that his apology would only be one of many if her fears were realized. If he left her today, repeating that nothing between them had changed, her fractured heart would break in two.
“Hey,” he said, standing and coming to sit by her side, on the bed. “Talk to me.”
She shook her head, unable to speak her greatest worry.
“The doctor said he was confident the masses were benign,” he said, trying to guess the reason for her tears.
Aine squared her shoulders, took a deep breath, and closed her eyes. “I’m okay,” she said when she opened them again.
“No, you’re not.”
“More effects of the anesthetic.”
Griffin shook his head. “Tell me the truth, Aine.”
The tears she’d demanded away, returned, flooding her eyes. “Don’t leave me,” she whispered.
Griffin cupped her cheek with his palm, leaned forward, and brought his lips to hers. “Even if you’re better off without me?”
“Never,” she murmured. “Never leave me again.”
“You know what I do for a living.”
“That isn’t what I mean. Don’t make me live without you, Griffin.”
