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He sighed. “Because I’m not certain Konstantine has been effectively neutralized.”
“Is that the only reason?”
He grasped my hand, and this time, I didn’t jerk it away. “I care very much for you, Kensington. So much so, that I would break my own heart first rather than allow you to live a life that would ultimately make you unhappy.”
“Being with you wouldn’t make me unhappy.”
“Maybe not right away. Eventually, you would be, though.”
“How can you be so certain? Can you also see into the future?”
“I am far older than you, my dear. I am set in my ways. I travel for work far too often.”
I rolled my eyes. “You’re not that old, Cortez.”
“Perhaps not in years, but in spirit.”
“I’m not the right woman for you.”
“What makes you say it that way?”
“You’d do anything for the right woman. If you loved her and wanted her in your life, you’d do anything to make it happen.” While the pain didn’t lessen, the realization that it was as simple as that, seemed to help me accept that Cortez and I would never be together. I removed my hand from his. “Where are you going? Can you say?”
His eyes scrunched, perhaps at my abrupt change of subject. “To Italy. Grinder is getting married.”
“That’s wonderful. Please give him my regards for much happiness.” I stood, suddenly famished. “I must get back to work.”
“I’ll walk with you.”
“Is that really necessary?” I looked around the park. “I can’t see them, but I’m sure my guard dogs are in close proximity.”
“Allow me to anyway?”
I shook my head. “It’s best if you don’t. I understand, Cortez, I truly do. But my heart hasn’t quite caught up with my head just yet.”
When I returned to the office, Linc wasn’t there, but on my desk sat a Greek salad and grilled pita bread. It was exactly what I would have ordered.
I wasn’t ready to think about getting involved with another man, and for now, Linc and I worked together. In the long run, being romantically involved might make things very awkward. However, when I was ready to move on, he was just the kind of man I’d do it with.
30
Rile
Between the time I said goodbye to Kensington and left Hyde Park, and this morning, I’d been filled with a sense of dread. Perhaps it was the finality I felt when she and I said goodbye.
Kensington was wrong. She was the right woman. I loved her, and like Celestina, I’d love her until the day I died. Because of that love, I couldn’t ask her to give up so much of her life for me.
She looked different to me yesterday. Fulfilled, I suppose. She’d taken her life by the reins and was living it. It was what I’d wanted for her, and London was the perfect place for her to do it. Eventually, once I was certain Konstantine was no longer a threat, I would return to Mallorca. Maybe I’d even sell my London flat. I could easily stay in one of MI6’s apartments if Z hired the Invincibles for a mission necessitating my being here. I could also stay in a hotel.
Rather than focusing on my sorrow and unease, I needed to direct my thoughts to Grinder and Pia. I rang my driver and grabbed my bag. Once at the airfield, my flight to Florence would take a little over an hour.
The small chapel on the grounds of Antica Cascina dei Conti di Valentini, the estate and winery that had been in the family of Grinder’s soon-to-be wife for generations, was filled to capacity. Love reverberated from its walls and through every person seated in it.
“How are you, my friend?” I asked, putting my hand on Grinder’s shoulder.
“Never better.”
