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Ben’s truck was in her driveway when they got home six hours later.
“When do you have to leave?” Liv asked, beginning to hate the question.
“I’m not leaving until tomorrow morning. I’m trying to get in touch with my dad. I’m hoping he can fly over and get me. I can get the truck when we’re back for the next show in Denver. If you don’t mind me leaving it here.”
“You can park your car in my garage anytime you want to.”
“You’ve been spending too much time with Mark. And, by the way, you don’t have a garage, baby.”
“Minor detail. By the way, if you’re hungry, I don’t have much food in the house.”
Liv had enough food in her freezer to feed every one of the hands who worked the Patterson Ranch. He’d never seen so much food in one person’s house. “I think we’ll be able to find something.”
She unlocked the back of the trailer, and chattered to Micah all the while. “You must be so tired of being on the road, boy. Mama got a little distracted on the way home. I’m sorry for that. I mean, I’m sorry for you, not so much for me.”
Was she not the purest thing that ever lived? Ben would miss her so much. Laughing with
her. Talking with her. Sitting in silence with her. Touching her. It hadn’t been six hours since he touched her, all of her, and he craved her all over again.
“Hey, are you sure you aren’t gonna need your truck? I mean, it’s sweet and all of you to stay with me tonight, but you won’t be back here until when? Six weeks from now?”
“I’ll be on tour, no need for the truck.”
Tour. God. How in the hell was he going to get through it without her with him?
19
Liv dropped Ben off at the airport in Centennial, but stayed in the car. They’d stayed up all night, talking, having sex, talking more. She was tired, but she wouldn’t have traded the time with him for anything in the world.
“This is one of the hardest things I’ve ever done,” he said to her before he got out of the car. “Every bit of me wants to ask you to go with me.”
“I’m not full yet, Ben.”
“I get it, Liv. I really do.”
Part of what they talked about last night how important barrel racing was to her. For the first time in her life, she was doing something for herself, and she had to do it. If she didn’t, she wasn’t sure what would become of her. It wasn’t as though they hadn’t talked about it before, but it was something Liv believed they needed to continue reminding each other of. Not just her dreams, but his too. She didn’t expect him to give her space alone, she had to do the same for him. That’s why she hadn’t asked him to come to Woodward. It wasn’t that she didn’t want or need him there. She had.
All of it resonated with Ben. He’d been there, more than once, he told her, when he knew that if he didn’t do something, he’d be lost. True with his music, and his sobriety, once he’d decided to own it.
It was also the way he felt the week he showed up at her place unannounced. And again when he threw a bag in his truck and drove to Oklahoma, not understanding why, but knowing he had to do it anyway. He was powerless not to.
“Olivia Fairchild, I’m gonna miss you like crazy.”
“Me, too.”
“I like knowing you will. Anything else you need to say to me before I go get on a plane and fly west?”
“I don’t want to let go of this, Ben.”
Liv cried the entire way home. She pulled off the highway in Castle Rock because she was sobbing. But it was good crying, not end of the world sobbing. It was I’ll miss him so much.
Jolene was due to arrive at her place in the morning to coach her, but only for a couple days. The next two events were in Colorado, then she’d head up to Idaho. She’d do these events on her own, and that’s the way she wanted it.
When she pulled into the driveway and saw Ben’s truck, she thought she might start crying again, but she didn’t. Seeing it there soothed her. She went in the house, climbed into bed and fell asleep, clothes and all.
When Liv went to change clothes the next morning, she found another shirt of Ben’s hanging on the knob of her closet door. She loved that he did that, and wondered what he took of hers this time.
She went out to get Micah ready and take care of the rest of the horses when Jolene pulled in. She parked next to Ben’s truck and pointed at it. “He’s here?”
