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“I know, but I want to make sure Grace’s okay. And I’ll stick around if it means getting to take out Roman.”
“With everything you’ve told me about the bastard I’m inclined to agree.”
“If you see an opening, take it.”
“Absolutely.”
Ben left my side and padded to the corner, where he turned in a couple of circles, lay down, and curled into a tight ball, paws tucked in, tail resting over his nose. He finally felt safe enough to sleep. Or at least, to try to sleep. He still didn’t look particularly comfortable.
I leveraged myself out of the chair and went to join him, settling on the floor and resting my hand on his back. He snuggled closer to me.
Cormac said, “I’ll keep an eye out.”
Then Ben seemed to relax.
I dozed, leaning against the wall, my arms draped over Ben, fingers laced in his fur. When he moved against me, I awoke and drew away as the fur under my touch thinned and shrank. I watched Ben come back to me.
Cormac said he’d keep watch, but he turned away when Ben started to shift back, when the fur faded and vanished, his skin stretched and bones melted into new shapes. It happened slowly, bit by bit. The Change back to human was like a sunrise—the sky paled, paled some more. Then—suddenly, you’d swear—it was daytime. Ben, naked and chilled, lay curled up, head and shoulders tucked into my lap, arms and legs pulled protectively close.
I stayed still, quiet, letting him sleep. Absently, I touched his ruffled hair, smoothing it behind his ear.
When he was human again, Henry came over with a blanket. He kept his distance, holding it out as an offering, taking care not to startle Ben by getting too close, for which I was grateful. I took the blanket from him and spread it over Ben.
The others left us alone, and we waited.
After a time, Ben tensed—I felt his muscles tighten against my leg. His nose flared, and he flinched awake, sitting up. I waited for him to gain his bearings, to get the scent of the place, to settle. It only took a second.
He looked at me. “I thought I’d lost you.”
I fell against him and we kissed. His arms closed tight around me and I pressed myself to him while our lips worked, hungry for each other’s taste. I wanted to rub myself all over his skin, taking in his warmth, his scent.
“Werewolves are all about instinct, emotion. They’re so full of passion. Makes them fascinating, don’t you think?” Boss had returned, regarding us from the doorway. He seemed to be speaking to Anastasia, conspiratorial, as if this was a long-running vampire joke.
Most vampires annoyed me because I didn’t know their ages. But to not even tell me his name? It was typical. Rick hadn’t been born with that name, Roman was an acquired name, and I really doubted that Anastasia was her original name, either. They’d reinvented themselves, like shedding old skins, when they became vampires. They could choose their identities, because who from their old lives was around to remember? To call out the inventions?
I tried to imagine Anastasia as a young woman, a child, eager instead of calculating and obsessed. And I couldn’t.
Joe was with Boss, and between them stood Grace Chen. Mission successful.
I rested my forehead against Ben’s shoulder and sighed. For just a moment, I’d been able to forget about everything, everyone, but him. We’d had our own little sphere of perfection, however fleeting. Ben kissed the top of my head and kept his arms around me, holding me close. Yeah, we could stay like that for a while longer.
“Are you okay?” I whispered, trying to keep the conversation between us.
His breath ruffled my hair, which felt marvelous, comforting. I reveled in the smell of him. “I’m feeling kind of stupid. I lost it. Completely.”
Obviously. “Why? You got through two fights without losing it. What happened?”
“When you didn’t answer, I panicked. I didn’t know what to do—so I lost it.”
“And came looking for me?”
“Yeah.”
“That’s sweet, you know.”
“I’m glad you think so.” We kissed again, a reassuring touch of lips. “What about you? You’re hurt, your leg—” He put his hand on my right hip, which twinged at the touch. But I held his hand there, not wanting him to move.
“I fell,” I said. “Broke something, I think.”
