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He smiled encouragement, confident of holding his influence over her thoughts and actions. ‘Go ahead and tell me,’ he invited, gesturing with open hands.
‘For one thing, I don’t want you guarding me like a watchdog any more.’
His smile turned rueful. ‘It was only for your protection, Natalie. You were...rather lost and defenceless.’
‘Well, I’ve found my defences again.’
‘Fine!’
‘And I never want to hear another word of criticism from you. It’s my life and I’ll live it as I see fit. Not as you see fit.’
That sobered him. His eyes went still and wary.
Her chin lifted in defiant self determination. ‘I don’t want you to ever mention Brett again in my hearing,’ she added strongly. Her flow of thought then faltered under his hard, relentless stare.
‘Is that all?’ he asked tersely.
‘More or less,’ she answered. ‘But I’ll think of more if you press me.’
‘In other words, you want me out of your life.’
‘Yes.’
‘As a business advisor and as a friend?’
‘Yes.’
He left her no alternative if he wanted to mix sex with friendship. Her gratitude for what he had done for her didn’t extend that far. Nevertheless, she did feel a certain hollowness burrowing through her stomach. He had been like a cog around which her life had turned for a long time. A mainstay. Her head swam a little with the enormity of cutting free from him. Did she really want that?
‘Is there another man?’ His harsh tone of voice ver
ged on the critical.
Natalie’s eyes flared. ‘Not yet. But there will be.’
He returned a steely challenge. ‘What do you really want, Natalie?’
Had he somehow read her mind? Sensed the doubt? The fearful uncertainty in severing all ties? Natalie focused hard on the question. If she was going to be her own woman, she had to know the answer. It came to her in a burst of bright clarity.
‘The best thing that ever happened to me was Ryan. I can’t replace him. He was a unique and wonderful child. But I can have another child who can be just as unique and wonderful, Damien. That’s what I intend to have.’
Damien sat back abruptly in his chair. Once again his face reflected shock. He stared at her as though he had never known her, an unseeing blankness in his eyes, all the clever intelligence frozen, or turned inward.
It sent a chill through Natalie’s heart. He had left her. The impulse to draw him back surged through her so wildly, words were spilling off her tongue before she could stop them.
‘Aren’t you glad to be rid of me? Aren’t you glad to have any responsibility to me set aside?’
The taunt succeeded. His eyes refocused on hers. ‘No.’
The stark negative gave her nothing to work on. Damn the man and his self-sufficiency! Why couldn’t he reveal what was going on inside him?
‘What purpose is there in our ever seeing each other again?’ she pressed. ‘Give me one good reason.’
‘Your husband was my friend,’ he said slowly, picking his words with care. ‘However much you think he loved you, I believe he was no friend to you.’
The import of those words was not lost on Natalie. She sat very still, holding her breath. Damien’s loyalty to Brett was cracking. Would he now speak the truth about her husband, reveal the infidelities he had helped to cover up? Did Damien even suspect how much she already knew, or was he still convinced he and Brett had artfully concealed everything?
He leaned forward. As though he had flicked a switch that flung open the windows of his mind, his eyes once more blazed with naked desire.
