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CHAPTER SIXTEEN
Zac hadn’t been to many immortal festivals, but he had to admit the level of organization was fairly impressive. Maury must’ve been planning this event for quite some time, well before the giant Minky-Mittens incident.
It was a warm, sunny day, and there were large tents all over the island with various demon events: acid house demon dance party, demon stand-up comedy, and demon theater. He’d only caught a glimpse of the play Demon Side Story, but it wasn’t half bad.
Maury had turned the other side of the island into a well-oiled demon fun machine, complete with rancid fried food vendors and “complimentary diarrhea,” Jell-O shots stations, free unhygienic genital piercings, and “super uncool” tattoos. All the things demons loved. Sin, gluttony, intoxication, and the opportunity to make permanent bad choices. Zac even saw a wedding chapel that had a “miserable divorce” package, which included demon lawyers—in case anyone wanted to get trashed, make a lifelong commitment, and then have it end in mutual destruction.
I really think the dick pic hut will be a hit. Basically, for five bucks, a demon could send a picture of his wanker to women on one of those dating apps and watch their reactions on a big screen. Apparently, demons had figured out how to embed spyware into the apps.
They also had the social media betting barn, where demons could place bets on which completely stupid concepts would trend on social media the fastest. When Zac peeked inside the barn, #castratemenatbirth was neck and neck with #hatingeveryoneisthenewselflove.
Zac was realizing how in less than a year, demons had truly engrained themselves into the human world, chipping away at their happiness. They’d been busy turning everyone against each other, too: Blacks and whites, women and men, families and single people, straight and gay, young and old, and so on. Humans didn’t seem to notice that their world was being taken over by creatures who wanted to destroy them.
The more hate, the more the demons thrived and the more powerful they grew.
But what could one man, one god, one person do about it?
Zac felt torn. He knew the demons were out to undermine the good hearts and souls of the world. He wished he could tempt humans to seek out another path. Acceptance. Love. Compassion. Critical thinking and questioning the status quo would be nice. But the situation seemed beyond his reach. The demons had made too much headway during the gods’ absence.
Without a doubt, Maury was a brilliant strategist. He knew exactly how and where to hit the gods and influence humans.
Shirtless, barefoot, and dressed in faded black jeans, Zac approached the welcome cocktail party on the beach. Thousands of demons, dressed to party, gathered around dangerously large bonfires, as a demon would. His eyes immediately gravitated toward Tula and her golden locks. Her petite frame was dressed in a pastel-pink summer dress that hit below the knee.
So prim and proper. So hot.
Gola stood next to her, wearing a low-cut white dress sparkling with rhinestones. Her long hairy legs were so furry that he wondered if they might catch fire. One spark was all it would take.
But as the sea of demons parted to make way for him, their faces illuminated by the firelight, he could swear that Gola’s eyes were flickering with pure love. It was hard to tell with all the drool happening, but a glossy glow of adoration was definitely there.
An unexpected flutter in Zac’s heart made him think. He’d kissed Gola a few days ago and knew it was her. His Tula. Today he’d kissed Tula and, yes, it felt good, but had there been a spark? He wasn’t sure.
Doubt flooded his heart. Was he being set up for yet another trick? Trust nothing. Expect anything. So maybe Tula was still in Gola’s body. He needed to be certain.
Zac stepped up to both women. “Tula, you look lovely tonight.” He kissed her hand. Soft skin. Warm. The very definition of pleasant.
“You look…muscular, Zac.” Tula batted her eyelashes at his chiseled pecs.
“Thank you.” He bowed his head and then took Gola’s cold, bony hand and placed a kiss atop it.
She sighed, and he felt a tiny spark of satisfaction. But was it the same as the time they’d kissed?
“So, where is Maury?” he asked.
“Oh, he just left,” said Gola. “You walked right past him. He had to oversee preparations for some big to-do tonight.”
No, Zac hadn’t seen him. He’d been too busy looking at Tula.
So Zac had the ladies all to himself. At least for a while. This was good. “Tula, would you mind going for a stroll down the dock?”
“Sure.”
Gola didn’t react the least bit jealous. Interesting.
“Gola,” he said, “after the stroll, would you be interested in getting a bite to eat? I understand from overhearing some of the other demons that the stale corndogs are excellent.”
