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When I return to the cave, I check over Steff and Pak. My son is curled up, sucking on his thumb as he sleeps, his tail flicking. His back is pressed to Steff's back, and the female shivers, her body trembling and her skin covered in small bumps. Oh no. Is this a bad reaction to the leaves? Have they made her ill? I think about Haal, and how she advised never to give too many leaves. That if someone ate too much, they would drift off to sleep and never wake again.
My gut churns and I move next to Steff, tapping her cheek. "Female. Steff. Wake."
She snorts and rouses, looking up at me with bleary eyes. A bit of drool has formed in one corner of her mouth and she swipes at it with her hand. "Hmm?"
I stroke my fingers down her arm, which is covered in bumps. "What is this?"
Her teeth clack and she immediately tries to pull me down against her. "God, you're warm."
I sink down against her, letting her pull me to the floor, and when she burrows against me, I realize she is seeking my warmth. Her fingers are like ice as she presses them against my chest, nuzzling against me. I think of the elders. Ezz would not approve. She is not Outcast clan. I should not touch her, even if she has an Outcast name. She is not one of us. She…
She rubs her nose against my chest, and…I like it. I slide my arms around her, careful to avoid her broken foot, and she snuggles against my chest as if she has always belonged there. She feels good in my arms, too. My cock pricks to attention, noticing her softness. She has so much bare skin pressing against mine. Without her layers of furs on, Steff is rounded all over, her belly and thighs plump and dimpled with health and good meals. She has a patch of fur between her legs, and she still wears those strange straps over her teats, which makes me wonder about them.
I touch the edge of one strap, unable to help my curiosity. "Do your teats still ache?"
She mumbles something against my chest and then plants my hand against one of her large, soft teats. I know she is still drunk with pain-leaves. Even so, I worry she is trying to tell me that she is in pain.
So I will treat this as if I would treat her ankle. "Show me where it hurts you, Steff. Let me help."
Steff makes a soft noise in her throat and tugs at the harness. She wants it off, then? I can help with that. I tug on the straps that cross over her shoulders, loosening them. The knot between her teats presses against my chest, reminding me that it is there, and I pull out my knife and slice it off, too. Then, her teats practically spill free, shocking me with just how much soft, pale skin there is. How did she hide this much teat under those bands? It is a mystery, and her skin has red, irritated lines from where the leather bit into her flesh.
"Is this what hurts?" I ask, rubbing her skin where the red bands have cropped up.
She whimpers and mumbles something under her breath, sliding a little closer to me. She raises an arm over her head, and the movement pushes her teat firmly against my hand, the tip scraping against my palm. Oh. It is hard, that little tip. Is it supposed to be? I think of Haal, when she was nursing Pak in the days before she died. I do not recall if her teats and their nipples were hard or soft. I never thought to look. I brush my fingers over the tip, learning the strange texture, and the female sucks in a breath.
In the next moment, a new scent drenches the cave, hot and thick. Arousal.
My cock surges, and I bite back a groan, pulling my hand away from Steff's abundant teats. It is the hardest thing I have ever done, releasing her, because I want to touch her more than anything. I want to chase down that arousal scent. I want to put my mouth on her skin and see if I can make that scent thicker, richer. But not while she is out of her mind on pain-leaves.
"Juth," she whispers, and when I look up at her, Steff's eyes are open, shining with her khui in the darkness. Her lips part, and she reaches for my hand again, placing it on her teat and then arching against my touch.
"No," I say, and pull away again. My mouth waters and I want to taste her all over. I want to drink in that scent she gives off. I want so many things, all of them wrong. I sit up, determined to put some distance between us, but she shivers and makes a soft sound of distress in her throat, reaching for me again.
