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I see now that letting her walk away that night in the bathroom at Animal Haven was a colossal mistake, one I refuse to make again. That doesn’t mean things will be easy, or that they’ll even work at all—I still have a massive secret that could rock us to our core—but I’m finally willing to take that chance if it means a shot at a future with Claire.
But first, I need to take things slow and figure out if she’s ready to toss her rules aside for someone like me—for a firefighter and a rancher and a reformed player.
“Maybe I like making you happy.”
She smiles, but as she watches me, that smile fades.
“What is it?” I ask, brushing my thumb along the apple of her cheek.
“I just don’t know where we stand,” she says, her eyes dropping to my chest before meeting mine again. “That night in the bathroom was…”
“Was what, Claire?”
“Perfect,” she sighs. “And I know we agreed to walk away, and I know that us being together goes against my rules, but I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you—about that kiss and the way your hands felt on my body. I finally decided to toss my rules out the window, but then the fire happened, and in the hospital room you seemed so angry at me. I just spiraled out of control after that and—”
I don’t know what else to do to get her to stop rambling, so I kiss her.
Claire’s eyes widen, but I coax her into submission with my lips, and within seconds her body is melting against mine.
“I wasn’t angry, Claire, far from it,” I whisper against her lips.
“Then what were you?”
“Scared, frustrated, sad, you name it. I’ll never be able to tell you what it was like for me when I heard you were in that fire. I was trying desperately to keep my emotions in check, because I knew I had to get you out of there. I was frustrated that you put your life in danger by running back in, but I got it. I got it, Claire. I understood why you did it. Doesn’t mean I liked it, because I don’t know what I would’ve done if something had happened to you that day. I was scared—scared of the feelings I had for you, scared that you didn’t feel the same way. And then I freaked out because I have a rule that I don’t date victims, and suddenly you were a victim. That frustrated the hell out of me, and I lashed out.”
She grins. “Us and our damn rules.”
“I hate our rules.”
“Me too. And I don’t want to be your victim, Trevor, any more than you want to be my test dummy.”
I smile. “You’re not my victim. Far from it. I’m just sorry it took so long for us to get to this point. I shouldn’t have kept you at arm’s length for so many years, and I should’ve told you sooner that I think you’re amazing and I want a chance to be with you. I’m sorry I got angry with you in the hospital. I didn’t know how else to process everything. Lashing out at you was easier than facing all those emotions, and honestly, I wasn’t sure if you were ready to hear everything I have to say.”
“I probably wasn’t. But I am now.”
“I know, sweetheart, and we’re going to talk about it, I promise. But it’s going to have to wait because I’ve got to work today. Speaking of which, what time is it?”
Claire reaches for her phone on the coffee table. “Six o’clock.”
“Shit.” As much as I hate to do it, I extricate myself from under Claire. “I’ve got to be at work in an hour, and I’ve still got to go home and shower.”
“Sorry, I should’ve set an alarm.”
“It’s not your fault. We both got sucked up in our conversation last night. Speaking of which, how are you feeling this morning?”
She shrugs. “Lighter.”
“That’s a start. The feelings are still there, I’m sure. It’ll take time to move on, but you’ll get there, and I’m going to be with you every step of the way.”
“Thank you for talking to me and staying with me. I really appreciate it.”
Resting my hand on hers, I squeeze. “Anytime, Claire. I’m always here for you.”
Claire looks at my hand on top of hers. “I slept better last night than I have in weeks.”
“Me too.”
“You know, you could always come back tonight, if you wanted.”
