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"I think this is it!" I exclaimed. I flipped through the book, excitement mounting when I saw that the pages were filled with handwritten entries. I quickly read a couple of sentences and confirmed that it was indeed my aunt's journal.
"I found it!" I was giddy, finally feeling like I was going to get a grasp on how to handle fighting Claudia and the vardogers. I would find the answers that I needed in this book. A wave of relief went through me.
Simon didn't look as impressed, his eyebrows lifting. "Do you really think that journal is going to help you?"
"I told you that while I was under hypnosis, my aunt said I would find the answers I needed in her journal. I was starting to think I'd never find it." I clutched the book tightly. "We should get out of here. Claudia might come back looking for me. We can go back to Lenore's house. I think it's safer there."
Simon nodded, standing with effortless grace and holding out his hand to me. I grasped his hand and he pulled me up fluidly.
"Thanks," I said, brushing off the dust that I had gotten on my sweater while digging underneath the floorboard. That's why I didn't see Simon rushing towards me. All I felt were his hands slamming me roughly against the wall. My head cracked against it with a sickening thud, the impact making my vision go hazy for a few seconds.
"Simon! What are you doing?!"
I whimpered when Simon jammed his arm across my neck, holding me up against the wall. His blue eyes were glinting with madness, his expression a grimace of malice. My thoughts were jumbled, not understanding what was happening. The pressure against my throat was starting to become excruciating, but I just stared at Simon blankly. I wondered if I had passed out and was dreaming now. This couldn't be really happening.
"This time I'm going to succeed in finishing you off," Simon hissed, so close to me that I could feel his spittle against my face as he spoke. "I'm going to enjoy killing you."
Chapter Six
"Simon!" I gasped, barely able to speak with the pressure against my larynx. My mind wasn't willing to accept what was happening, but my body automatically went into survival mode. I kicked out my legs, trying to make contact with his lower body, but Simon smoothly stepped out of the way, his arm continuing to crush my throat.
"You're a stubborn little bitch," Simon spat out, his eyes glowing with enjoyment. He was taking pleasure in this, his expression showing growing excitement. "You have to promise to make this fun for me. I like a little resistance."
My mind shut down as I grabbed at his arm with both hands, digging my nails into his flesh. Simon released the pressure on my throat, grabbing both wrists and slamming them against the wall above my head, pinioning them so I was helpless.
"Do you know how painful I can make this for you?" Simon was seething, the cruelty on his face taking my breath away.
"Simon, what's happening?" I wheezed, my throat burning with each word. Fear and desperation were setting in and I didn't understand what was happening. I had no doubt that Simon had been standing before me moments before, his eyes full of love and concern. The person before me wasn't Simon, but I hadn't seen the vardoger overtake his body. I couldn't believe that had happened, because that would mean Simon was gone. I couldn't accept that. "I know this isn't you! Simon, please! Where are you?!"
Simon smiled widely, the expression a mockery on his sadistic face. "I'm right in front of you, sweetheart." His gaze lowered, traveling down my body at a leisurely pace. I trembled under his scrutiny, my fear reaching heights as never before. "As distasteful as I find you, I can push aside my disgust momentarily, if it means making you scream in pain."
He shoved my wrists, which were still pinioned against the wall above me, together so that he could hold them prisoner with one hand, his other hand lowering to grasp my chin, his fingers digging cruelly into my flesh. I struggled against him frantically, trying to buck him off me, but he was too strong.
"I should fix your mouth first. I'm sick of hearing you talk. I'm sure you'd find it a lot harder to spew your garbage if I pulled out your teeth one by one." The pressure of his hand grasping my chin increased, forcing my mouth open. Fury rose in me and I felt like a crazed animal being prepared for slaughter. I struck out with the only weapon I had, twisting my head sharply and sinking my teeth into the fleshy side of his hand, biting down viciously until I tasted blood.
"Fuck! You bitch!"
Simon immediately let go of me, ripping his hand out of my mouth. He was shaking with rage as he backhanded me so hard I fell to the floor, my vision blurry from the impact. I could taste blood inside my mouth, but all I could think about was finding a weapon. My fingers wrapped around the lamp I had dropped earlier and I held it out in front of me.
"Get away from me!" I screamed. Blood was dripping from Simon's hand where I had bit him, but he didn't seem to notice as he stalked me, backing me into a corner. I tried to concentrate, to imagine Simon's vardoger leaving his body and being sucked into mine, but I was so frazzled that my concentration was shit.
I was preparing to swing the lamp against Simon's head with all my might when he stopped dead in his tracks. He looked confused, blinking like he was trying to shake himself out of a fog. He drew in a sharp breath when he saw me, stepping forward.
"Stop!" I screamed, shaking so badly that I was surprised my lips could form the words. "Don't take another step or I'll bash your head in."
Simon immediately halted, his confusion turning into concern. "Caitlin! You're bleeding! What happened?"
"Is this some kind of fucking trap? You're going to pretend you're Simon and then attack me when I let you get close? Do you think I'm an idiot!?"
"Caitlin, it's me!" Simon cried out, looking desperate. He held out a hand in supplication then froze when he saw the blood dripping from it. He looked up at me and then down at his bloodied hand again.
"I don't understand," he whispered, shaking his head like he was in a bad dream and wanted to wake up. "The last thing I remember is you finding the journal and then...I'm standing in front of you, and you're screaming at me, bleeding." He met my eyes, pleading with me. "Caitlin, please. Tell me what happened."
I heard myself whimpering, feeling disconnected from the scene as if I were a bystander. Simon, the boy I loved, had been overtaken by his vardoger. I hadn't been able to save him. Could I actually believe he was still inside there as well? From what my aunt had told me, only seers were strong enough to not let vardogers push their souls out of their bodies, instead existing side by side in the human form. But here was Simon before me, swearing that it was him. And, by God, I wanted to believe him.
I forced myself to think, to assess the situation rationally. I knew firsthand that the rules were changing, and it was possible that Simon had been able to resist the vardoger pushing his soul out. Hell, anything was possible at this point.
"So you don't remember attacking me?" I asked cautiously, still not convinced that this wasn't a trap.
