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My eyes fluttered open, squinting from the light that seemed harsher and brighter than before. Lenore, Cecelia and Marie were hovering over me looking terrified, their faces flushed as they repeatedly yelled out my name. Lenore had one hand on my shoulder and was shaking me roughly.
I sat up and pushed off Lenore's hand, trying to get some room to breathe. "I'm okay, I'm okay. Please stop crowding me."
Marie fell onto a chair opposite me, her shoulders slumping with relief. The relief turned to anger when her attention shifted to Lenore. "I told you it was too dangerous! We almost lost her!"
Cecelia was still standing, wringing her hands together and staring at me wide-eyed. Lenore ignored Marie's outburst and sat down on the sofa next to me, watching me closely.
"Did you see anything?"
All the images I had experienced crowded my mind and I struggled to put them into order, to make sense of them. "Yes, but it was confusing. I just got snippets of things, not the full picture." I took a deep breath before continuing. "But I can tell you that the vardogers are stronger than ever. Aunt Brenda told me about their physical tell once they've overtaken their person. About the pupils dilating when you say their name. They can control that now. They've made that weakness obsolete."
Cecelia sat down at my revelation, wringing her hands even more frantically and making a small sound of distress. Lenore ignored her, her eyes boring into mine. "What else?"
"Simon and Sarah's vardogers were able to detach themselves because of Claudia. My vardoger isn't even with me now. It's with Claudia. Claudia's vardoger is no ordinary shadow. Now that it has control over Claudia's body, its powers are immeasurable. It has the power to sustain other vardogers, to forge their energies together so that they can defeat even the most powerful seer."
"And who's the most powerful seer?" Lenore's voice was hushed. Even Cecelia had stopped wringing her hands. I couldn't see Maria's expression because her head was bowed.
"It-it can't be me," I stammered, my heart pumping loudly, fear coursing through every vein in my body.
"Who is it?" Lenore asked again, her voice harsher this time.
"I saw them trying to enter me, to take over my body. My vardoger, Simon and Sarah's vardogers...they're going to try and overtake me. I think they believe that their combined energies will be strong enough to push out my soul. Even while I'm awake." My voice had quieted to a whisper, and I felt chilled by my own words. Saying out loud what I saw under hypnosis made everything seem real. Too real. "Or worse. Even if they can't push out my soul, they think they can still overtake me. So my soul is trapped while they control my body."
"But the iridium." Cecelia interrupted, straightening with a determined expression on her face. "They can't touch you while you're wearing iridium."
Lenore didn't turn to look at Cecelia. Instead, she kept her gaze on me, looking contemplative. Even though her look wasn't accusatory, I felt as if I were somehow to blame for all of this. I couldn't help feeling guilty as I told them the worst news.
"They've found something to counteract iridium. To negate iridium's properties that protects seers from vardogers. I don't know what it is. It looks like iridium, but instead of reflecting light, it reflects shadows."
Cecelia cried out in horror and even Lenore's expression darkened. Marie kept her head bowed, but she started rocking back and forth.
"I'm sorry." I felt the need to apologize. I didn't want to be the bearer of this horrible news.
"Was there anything else?"
I bit my lip before answering Lenore. A part of me wanted to keep the last thing I had seen under hypnosis a secret. It's not that I thought my aunt's friends had any ill intentions. After all, they were her inner circle, the people that she relied on. But I didn't know if I had the luxury of trusting anyone right now.
"Caitlin?" Lenore sounded impatient and I decided I would have to take the plunge and trust someone. I couldn't do this on my own.
"I saw Aunt Brenda. She told me to look for her journal. That I'll find the answers that I'm looking for there."
"Answers to what? To the vardogers evolving? To what they've found to combat iridium?"
"I don't know. Everything started becoming hazy and then I felt like I was drowning. Maybe you can put me under again—"
Marie lifted her head and finally spoke. Her eyes were shimmering with tears but her expression was fierce. "No! Absolutely not. Caitlin, w
e almost lost you. Your pulse kept getting slower and fainter until we couldn't feel it anymore. You were barely breathing. At one point, I think you stopped completely. And your skin...it was so cold. We tried and tried but we couldn't pull you out."
Marie turned her gaze to Lenore and I could see the accusation in her eyes. "I should never have let you put her under. Don't think I'll let you do it again."
Lenore sighed, as if Marie was just a nuisance. "I wasn't going to suggest putting her under hypnosis again. But everything turned out fine. We got important information. Information that will help us save lives. Isn't that the whole point?"
Marie didn't answer. Instead, she just looked away, her mouth tightening. I wondered at the dissension between Marie and Lenore. I had assumed my aunt's inner circle was a harmonious group but there were apparently some power plays happening that I wasn't privy to. But that wasn't my concern right now.
"Are you sure?" I asked. "Maybe I should go under again. I didn't get the complete picture."
Lenore shook her head. "No, Marie is right. We can't take the chance again. We were just lucky that you were powerful enough to pull yourself out." She gave me a speculative look. I ignored it, standing up. I had to brace myself against the arm of the sofa, feeling faint from the movement. Lenore got up quickly, holding my shoulder.
