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Lifeless.
“Soph?” he questioned as she began to climb into the back seat, completely ignoring him. The door closed with a soft snick just as he reached her. When he went for the door handle, her mother locked it.
“She’s really not into men, Lennox,” Mrs. Bennett told him as she tried to slide her hands up his chest. Frowning when he pulled away from her slimy touch, she said to him, “How about you and I go out soon, huh?”
His eyes narrowed at her question. “You’re married, Mrs. Bennett.”
“Doesn’t mean I can’t have fun.”
He couldn’t deal with that woman. Dear God, did she have no shame? “Good-bye, Mrs. Bennett,” he replied politely, aware his mother was watching, and slut or not, he knew she’d smack him if he said what he really wanted to.
When she got back in her car, his fingers automatically went to the rear window, wishing Soph would climb back out. Talk to him for a while. Closing his eyes as they pulled away, he imagined her fingers touching the same spot on the inside of the car.
“Fuck!” he screamed, unable to hold his frustration in.
When he turned to go back to the house, his family was standing there watching the whole exchange. “Don’t, Ma,” he told her softly, walking inside when she would have given him shit for swearing.
“I know, son,” she whispered back. Obviously aware of more than he was.
Nineteen. Sophia was an adult. So why did she feel like a child? Why couldn’t she break free of the hold her mother had over her?
Stupid.
A word. Six simple letters.
Yet, they brought forth her biggest insecurities.
All of her pain sprang forth as soon as it passed her mother’s lips. Every time she tried to assert her independence, her mother would tell her how stupid she truly was. How she wouldn’t make it in the world without her.
As she sat in the back of her father’s BMW, every one of her doubts raced forward at warp speed. She wanted out of her mother’s clutches, only with no way to escape, she had no idea what to do. She had tried going to her father, but he had been no help. With the choice of a quiet home or facing her mother’s wrath, he’d chosen to stay out of everything. Instead, locking himself away in his office for work or to drink. Sometimes both.
Looking back to Lorraine’s house, to Lennox, she wondered if maybe they could help her find her strength. Free herself from being unworthy.
It was an impossible dream nonetheless. She would never in a million years consider letting someone in on her home life. Watching her mother flaunt herself around town like a whore was bad enough. If they knew how weak she, herself, was, well, it was a shame she couldn’t bear.
Her mother’s glare in the reflection of the rearview mirror caught her attention. Unsure of what she’d done wrong, she remained quiet. “You stay away from him,” she warned.
“Okay,” she answered softly.
“He likes a refined woman,” she gloated.
When Sophia didn’t give the response her mother wanted, she continued on. “He doesn’t like weak women.” She refused to engage in her mother’s tirade. “Stupid women don’t attract him.”
Bullseye.
Right in the heart.
The smile on her mother’s face was disgusting. She enjoyed tormenting Sophia, and she failed to understand why.
“Why?” She summoned the courage to ask quietly.
Harsh laughter was her only response.
Watching as the town rolled by through her window, Sophia couldn’t help wondering if maybe she really was stupid? She often missed social cues, couldn’t read a person’s mood, and generally just tried to keep out of the public.
“You never did understand what it means to be a Bennett, Sophia. You have to exude poise and grace.” And sleep with any willing dick. Sophia didn’t voice that out loud, of course. “You should be locked away. Seen, never heard.” Her mother continued speaking, but she tuned her out.
Rebecca loved to hear her own voice. She was so self-involved that she didn’t always notice when people insulted her. The way Lennox had. She’d just kept flirting and embarrassing herself.
