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worried Loch. She was waking up with nightmares she couldn’t or wouldn’t remember and has been hesitant in accepting his comfort. He wanted to get her out of Loveland as soon as possible.
After basically demanding that she marry him at the compound, they hadn’t spoken about it out loud again, but it was all Loch could think about. Her having his name, wearing his ring, belonging to him. It consumed him in a gut-wrenching manor. It physically hurt him knowing she wasn’t his yet.
Nox and Levi had tried to talk him out of it until Hayes and Soph told them both to shut it and politely explained that they were precisely the same way. The only difference being, Loch wasn’t waiting the way they were. His brothers had protested that one and promptly took their girls home, leaving Loch to ponder on his own empty house, wondering what Sage was doing. How she was feeling.
They still knew very little about each other. Their likes and dislikes, the quirks that would drive most people wild. His mother had tried to point that out to him the night before while Sage was relaxing in a warm tub. Loch had simply explained to Lorraine that they had all the time in the world. Because they did.
Even with the feeling of impending doom sitting in his gut, Loch knew it was right. Like he knew the sun would set each night and rise each morning. Some things were just meant to be.
Sage was meant to be his.
Loch’s mom had wanted to accompany Sage to the church, intent on introducing her to the pastor, but she had managed to convince the older woman that she craved anonymity after what had happened at the hospital. If not for Braxton, she likely wouldn’t have been able to do it.
He’d managed to convince Lorraine that Sage needed time to make peace with herself alone and without an audience. Hating to admit it herself, Sage remained quiet as he spoke. He was right. The feelings of disconnect from the deity she’d worshipped her entire life was chilling her to the bone. While Sage believed her father followed a traditional Christian Bible and their beliefs, she also understood that he had warped them to his own indulgences and what he thought the congregation should be.
Sage wanted to know what the rest of the world believed. She wanted to learn how everyone else handled their own temptations and ideologies. Mostly, she wanted to know if God would forgive her for turning her back on her family after their betrayal.
She had been plagued with nightmares each night about what happened back home, of what caused her to leave. Of all the things before that. When the girl went missing all those years ago. Her mind was a fractured mess of memories and emotions, and she didn’t know what was real and what was fiction.
Even though Lochlan was always there to hold her when she awoke from the night sweats and pain of having to relive every horrible moment, she couldn’t bring herself to tell him the truth. Not because she didn’t trust him, but because she saw the agony he went through when she was in the hospital. Knowing what happened and that he hadn’t been there to stop it was eating away at him. She just didn’t want to add to his worries.
There was so much for them to work through, together and alone. Which was a significant reason why Sage had needed to go to church so badly. Clarity was a powerful thing. Even though Lochlan had asked her to marry him, they hadn’t spoken of it again. Her heart said yes, sung it really, but her mind worried he would regret it.
“Welcome,” a clothed man greeted Sage as she entered the cathedral. Lorraine had insisted Braxton bring her to First Congregational Church because of its history and open arms in welcoming diversity.
Smiling at him shyly, she nodded, and Braxton led her to a row of pews so she could sit. Feeling overwhelmed, she looked around, soaking in the rich history and welcoming atmosphere. A large cross with Jesus clothed in white robes and bright flowers hung center at the front of the room. Large, imposing, she could feel the gentle sway of his acceptance to her hesitation.
“You want me to stay with you?” Braxton whispered from behind her.
Looking to the imposing man, with his tattoos and dark eyes, she said, “I’ll be fine.” Even if his presence was an odd comfort.
“I’ll wait on the steps for you.” He walked away, paying respects to the man who had welcomed them, Father Tom.
“You sure you won’t stay, young man, I’m about to rehearse this Sunday’s sermon. You’d be able to advise before I’m left to the wolves.” There was light-hearted laughter in the man’s words, as well as kinship with her stoic watchdog.
“Not today, Tom, but Sage could use an encouraging word or two.” Silence rained at Braxton’s parting words, and she didn’t know if she wanted to hug him or smack him. Which from what she’d been told, was often the way people felt around him.
A light hand startled Sage into turning towards the pastor. “I’m sorry, dear. I only wanted to introduce myself. I’m Father Tom Malcolm. Welcome to the First Congregational Church.” His smile was warm and welcoming, instantly putting her at ease.
“Thank you, Father, I’m Sage Marlowe.” Her voice was still shy and quiet.
“Please, I am not so formal, call me Tom.” At her nod, he asked, “What brings you here today, Sage?”
Unsure of how she felt about telling this stranger why she was feeling so lost, she shrugged.
“Alright, well, I was going to close the church to prepare my sermon for the weekend. You’re more than welcome to stay and listen if you’d like.” His kind offer couldn’t be refused as he walked to the podium and began speaking.
“This year we have been blessed with many new members to our church, and I would like to welcome you all and speak about new beginnings. Many a man and woman have tried to disprove the existence of God and His creations. I believe it cannot be done. Possibly, as has been suggested, God precedes existence. Instead, believing in God is a conscious choice we make—a choice for hope rather than despair; a choice of possibility over fate, of love over indifference.
“A faith choice.
“The good news is, God did not just create a new world, He is still creating it. Ensuring there is always a new beginning, a fresh start. Creation happens more than on this earth, it’s everywhere. He has an ongoing process of giving us more to discover daily.
“In a world dominated by money and power, God has made it so that the oppression and violence will run out of steam. The storms and floods, hurricanes and earthquakes, are all God’s way of balancing the world out.
“He’s making way for new beginnings. Giving us a clean slate to begin anew. Learn from our mistakes and move forward. As a whole, we can save our world and create new life. Good life.”
His words were encouraging and full of conviction. Sage felt them to her soul as he continued to speak. Closing her eyes, she soaked up his words, absorbing them into her heart as he spoke of forgiveness and healing. Accepting one’s self in peace and harmony.
