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I rush inside and lock the door before he can do or say anything. Tears stream down my face as he pounds on the wood and calls me obscene names.
“Mom!” Tommy comes rushing down the stairs visibly terrified.
“Back upstairs, honey, it’s fine.” I can’t bring myself to look at him. He’ll see all of my pain, the swelling from Jack’s blow. I’m raw. I can’t let him see me like this.
After I hear his steps retreating, I quickly order pizza for dinner and go up to my room, intent on cleaning myself up before I have to face my son and tell him everything’s all right.
On my bed is an envelope with my name scrawled across it in bold letters. I don’t know if I have the energy to give him what he wants anymore. What they both seem to want so desperately.
As I open the letter, something falls to the ground, and I look down to see dried yellow daisy leaves. I can’t contain the sobs that consume me as I read.
Paisley,
I walk around camp constantly saying your name. I love the way it rolls off my tongue. How delicate and soft it sounds.
Paisley…
I especially love the way I can picture moaning it against your lips for the first time.
Paisley…
As sweet as a Daisy.
I know they’re not as fresh or look as nice as in the store, but I hope you can find comfort in the petals as if I gave them to you myself.
We haven’t met, hell, we haven’t spoken, but I know you, Paisley. Your words speak of everything you want but won’t ask for. Everything I suddenly want to give you.
When I come home, I’m coming for you.
Both of you.
Love, Gage
My fears and dreams. Hopes and failures. They all sweep through me at the speed of light as I soak in his letter. The petals delicate in my hands as I fight back the overwhelming urge to beg him to keep his promise.
Sadly, as I’ve learned, words are simply that. Words.
You can’t trust what you can’t see.
Chapter Four
Gage
A package came for me as we were out on patrol and one of these little fucks decided to open it. I’m tempted to kill the fuckers. Especially since Paisley hasn’t responded back to me the last two times I wrote her. Tommy has been, but he also hasn’t been his normal cheery self either, and I’m going crazy not knowing what’s happening.
After having to deal with watching Killian, the captain of our unit, go all googly-eyed over the girl writing to him, I’m dreading opening this box. I want a letter from her to be in there. I don’t know what I’ll do if there isn’t.
Picking up the open box, I begin pulling out the container of double chocolate chip cookies that are suspiciously open already, some essentials they’ve packed for me like deodorant, toothbrush, and other necessities. Seeing the Marvel comic books, I feel a smile spread across my face. Tommy and I had talked about our favorite superheroes, both of us agreeing that Iron Man and The Hulk were the best.
Seeing only one letter with Tommy’s childish script on the front, I’m disappointed. I know something’s wrong with Paisley, I just can’t figure out what. I could ask the kid, but I don’t want to put him in the position of essentially telling on his mom.
Pulling the letter from the envelope I’m opening, what I see breaks my heart.
Soldier man,
I haven’t told you, but mom is sad. Jack came to the house a couple weeks ago, and when he left, Mom had a bruise on her face. She’s never cried so hard before, and I don’t think I’m strong enough for us both.
I’m afraid Jack will try to come back and take me. I told Mom I don’t want to see him no more, but I think he’s been to my school before. I don’t know if it was him for sure.
