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Eliza tromped through the muddy snow, trying hard not to stumble. She pumped her arms in the long heavy sleeves and puffed white clouds of air as she mumbled under her breath. All the while Thomas marched behind her. Her discontented thoughts rattled in her brain. Suddenly, she stopped and circled around to face Thomas, unleashing a scourging of her own.
“I had a grand plan Thomas, until you decided to come searching for me. No one would have recognized me in these clothes!” She moved her hands up and down in front of her. “Then you had to make a scene!”
He jerked the hat off her head, his hot words flying through gritted teeth. “You think this disheveled, ill-fitting mess you call a disguise would make you invisible to those around you?” He patted the tricorne back on her head with a scoff.
“Yes, I do! You saw the crowd, Thomas, there were hundreds upon hundreds of people—there is no possible way I could have been spotted, let alone recognized by anyone. Frankly, I cannot understand your anger.”
Thomas shook his head and the muscles tightened in his jaw. “It was a fool’s errand, Eliza.”
She exhaled a sharp breath and squared her posture. “It was not. I learned a great many things. Very important things. I’m glad I went!”
Tilting her chin upward, Eliza slammed her hands on her hips. “How did you even know I was gone? I thought of everything. My plan was flawless.”
This time he threw his head back and laughed. “Not in the least. If it had been flawless, I’d never have known you were gone.”
“How did you know?”
The features of his face relaxed. “I noticed you weren’t in your regular spot by the fire like you usually are that time of evening. I got worried.” He gazed at the house. “I asked Kitty where you were and she said you’d retired early, which you never do. That also heightened my concern. When Kitty went to bed, well, I’m sure you can figure out the rest.” A mocking tone echoed in his voice.
Looking at the sky, Eliza stomped her foot and growled. “Why couldn’t you have left it alone, Thomas? I would have made it home safely and you would have never known about any of this.” Suddenly, the bottled frustration she’d held on to for weeks bubbled to the surface. She leaned forward and pointed a finger at his chest. “And tell me, when have you ever really noticed me, or where I am, or where I sit? You never look at me. You avoid me like I’m the pox!”
Her volume reached new levels and she had to force herself not to yell up into his face. She spoke through her teeth to keep her voice low. “You’ve done your best to keep us safe and help me learn what I’ve needed to know about Father—and for that I will be forever grateful, but you can’t honestly pretend that you care!”
Thomas captured her shoulders again and pulled her in front of him with a jerk, making her hat fall to the ground. The glowering look in his eyes simmered and Eliza turned her head away. Taking a hand from her shoulder he wrapped his strong, gentle fingers around her chin, compelling her to look at him.
The low resonance in his rich voice was both imposing and tender. “I notice everything about you.”
Eliza tried to pull away, her heart beating against her lungs. “I don’t believe you. You’re actions say otherwise.”
Thomas huffed and glanced away before locking eyes with her again. “I’ve tried to keep away from you, to keep from developing feelings for you, Eliza. I know you have a life in Boston and I’ve only ever brought you trouble . . . but I can’t dictate my heart.”
He brushed his calloused fingers against her cheek. Eliza closed her eyes, relishing the feel of his tenderness. It was too wonderful to be real.
“I couldn’t bear to see you hurt again, Eliza. That’s what caused my anger. Not the fact that you went to the rally.” His honey voice softened. “If anything had happened to you, I would never have forgiven myself, and not because it’s my duty to care for you, as you think. Because I love you.”
Eliza’s breath hitched, and her heart thumped at the sparkle of surprise in his eyes, as if he hadn’t meant to speak the tender words. But from the way his gaze roamed her face, it seemed he didn’t regret saying them.
She looked up with parted lips, soaking in the sweet dew of his affections as he stepped closer. As if unwrapping precious china, he unwound the scarf that still circled her hair and let it drop to the ground near the hat. He smoothed his fingers around her ears, cupping her head, and directed her face toward his. All the world disappeared, the surrounding trees and shadows melting together and closing around them like a celestial dream.
He stepped closer and her knees turned as weak as the wilted blades of snow-covered grass at her feet. “What are you doing?” she whispered, trembling under his touch. An unmistakable hunger swirled in his gaze, reaching out and expanding the longing of her own.
The heat in his low voice stole her breath. “I’m doing what I’ve wanted to do for a v
ery long time.”
He leaned toward her, but she put a hand on his chest to stop him, her heart slamming against her ribs.
His dark eyebrows crunched down. “What is it?”
Eliza swallowed, trying to keep her voice even. “Last time you kissed me, you avoided me as if I were a poison. I don’t want that to happen again.”
A quiet, rumbling laugh escaped him. “You are anything but a poison, Eliza.”
He cradled her face in his hands, tilting it upward and nuzzled her cold nose with his. She closed her eyes and inhaled in a ragged breath as his warm lips moved across the corners of her eyes, her cheekbones, her ear. Delicious shivers sprayed down her skin and she clung to his chest to keep from falling. His hands brushed down her neck and shoulders—one resting behind her head, the other at her back, as if he wanted to keep her safely next to him forever.
Dear Lord, I love him.
In that moment, she gave her heart to him, and no matter what, she never wanted it back.
