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It doesn’t mean I haven’t missed her like crazy, though. Memories of how amazing it was to touch her soft skin, to kiss every inch of her, to feel her writhe underneath me flood in. How could I just forget that? It’s taken residence in my goddamn head with no sign of leaving.
Since I’ve been sleeping like shit, I get up early for work and stay busy with hopes it occupies my mind. It does until she messages me or I run into someone who asks about our “engagement” and then I have to act like she hasn’t ripped out my heart. Half the town still thinks we’re getting married. It’s been hell.
Just as I’m filling buckets with goat pellets, Grayson struts into the barn with dirty jeans and a cowboy hat. It’s too early for him to be a mess, so I’m guessing he slept in his work clothes again.
“You’re not scheduled to be here today,” I tell him. He’s supposed to be helping Diesel with the cattle.
“Nice to see ya too.” He flashes a shit-eating grin as if he’s up to something.
“What do you want? I’m busy.”
“I’m just relaying a message. Harper’s lookin’ for ya. You’re supposed to text her back.”
I grunt, keeping my comments to myself.
“Are the future newlyweds fighting?”
I suppress the urge to roll my eyes. She’s been blowing up my phone nonstop, and though I feel bad for ignoring her, I need time to figure out how the hell I’m supposed to go back to being just friends like she wants.
Before I can tell him to mind his own damn business, Kane walks in since the twins are working with me today. Instead of going to his station, he approaches me.
“Harper’s lookin’ for ya,” Kane says.
“So I’ve heard.” I swallow hard and keep my annoyance to myself. She’s gonna start the rumor mill up again if she keeps this up.
“I don’t know why she’s making me tell you, but you’re supposed to text or call her back.” He shrugs.
“Thanks for the memo,” I deadpan.
Knox struts in, pulling Cupcake on a leash. Ever since he got busted for letting her out, I’ve put him on permanent Cupcake-watching duty.
“Hey, Harp—”
“I know!” I snap. “Got the message. Jesus.”
“You fucked her, didn’t you?” Knox smirks like an idiot.
Grayson’s brows pop up, and Kane chuckles.
“Shut the hell up before I fire your ass.”
“That’s a yes,” Knox mutters, snickering.
“Get to work,” I bark out, then move my gaze to Kane. “You too.”
Grayson stands with his arms crossed as he sizes me up, studying me as the twins leave.
“What?”
“Well, is it true?” he asks.
I grab the full buckets and walk toward the pastures, ignoring him. Of course he follows, not giving me any damn space.
“You can talk to me, man. I’m not gonna go blab your business around or judge you. But if something happened between you two, maybe I can help.”
I scoff in disbelief as I open the gate. When we enter, the goats swarm us. “And how’re ya gonna do that?”
“Well, first you come clean and tell me what happened. Then I give you the advice.”
“What if I don’t want it?”
“Too damn bad.” He flashes a cocky grin as if he knows he’ll eventually get it out of me.
“Yeah, we had some drinks and slept together,” I admit, maneuvering around Cream Puff and Cheesecake, who are screaming. “I was ready to pour my heart out to her the morning after, but she freaked out and said it was a huge mistake. She wanted to pretend it never happened.”
“Ouch.” He scrubs his finger over his jawline. “And I’m guessing you don’t.”
“A couple days after that, I admitted my feelings, and when she hesitated, I asked her to choose between a potential relationship or our friendship. I was so damn confident she’d confess she felt the same, but she picked staying friends instead.”
“Fuck, man. Anyone who’s been around you two for more than ten seconds could see your chemistry. From what my sources tell me, she’s had feelings for you for a long-ass time, so I’m surprised she’d say that.”
“Your sources?” I snort, amused.
“Hey, just because Kenzie ignores me ninety-nine percent of the time doesn’t mean I don’t overhear every word those girls talk about.”
“Harper doesn’t really hang out with them.”
“No, but Hadleigh’s her best friend, who tells Kane everything, who talks to Diesel, who then mentions shit to Rowan. And once Rowan knows…”
They all do.
“Well it doesn’t matter anyway. She’s made her choice,” I state matter-of-factly as I scatter pellets on the ground.
“So what, you’re just going to ignore her from now on and hope you don’t run into her? Considering y’all live ten minutes away from each other, that’s highly unlikely,” he tells me as I force the empty bucket into his hand.
“I don’t know what my plan is, okay? I don’t have anything else to say. I spilled my heart to her and got crushed, so…” I shrug, feeling the pain all over again.
