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Conversation with Huck
Huck: “Dandelion, what’s your post about?”
Dandelion: “I was just thinking about my childhood.”
Huck: “Uh-oh.”
Dandelion: “What? You don’t know a thing about my childhood. Maybe it was great and filled with smiley face stickers.”
Huck: “Was it?”
Dandelion: “Half of it was.”
Huck: “That’s nice.”
Dandelion: “Yep.”
Huck: “You gonna tell me about the other half?”
Dandelion: “My mom and dad were stereotypical high school sweethearts who loved each other. At least that’s what I thought. Then when I was about thirteen my dad cheated on my mom, and I mean really cheated on her. He obliterated my mom’s heart like shrapnel. Everyone got hit.”
Huck: “Sounds rough.”
Dandelion: “That’s not even the worst part.”
Huck: “Of course not.”
Dandelion: “We were waiting, at least I thought we were. Because they used to fight like that a lot. He would leave, she would cry, and then he would come back. So when they divorced, I kept waiting for him to come back, like he always did. When my mom showed up with a new guy I was like ‘woah, what the fuck are you doing here? My dad is going to be right back.’”
Huck: “How did your mom react?”
I paused at Huck’s question. I hadn’t told anyone about my mom and dad’s divorce, not even Effie. Of course Effie knew about the divorce in general. She’d been my rock during the whole ordeal and had helped me cope. She and I had rented movies and shopped, distracting ourselves like any good teenagers would, but we never talked.
I never gave voice to the concerns in my head. I didn’t want to, because that would mean admitting my father had faults. It would mean admitting that my father wasn’t infallible like every daughter wants to believe. It would mean admitting that he was human like everyone else, and it would mean admitting that he was a pretty shitty human, too.
Huck was a stranger behind the screen. He didn’t know Nami DeGrace and he definitely didn’t know my family. I could finally air my burdens without consequence. When I typed out my response, the catharsis I felt was palpable.
Conversation with Huck
Dandelion: “It wasn’t fair to her, which I realize now, because my dad was out gallivanting with his latest woman, while my mom was just trying to repair her shattered heart. It was at least three years after the divorce when my mom brought home Tony, too, so it wasn’t like he just showed up. I was the one still waiting.”
Huck: “How are you and your mom now?”
Dandelion: “Oh my mom got in a car accident with my dad the one time they were together after the divorce. They died instantly.”
Huck: “Shit.”
Dandelion: “Yeah. I laugh about it when I think how long I waited for him to come home and then when he came home, they both died. Kind of ridiculous.”
Huck: “Dandelion?
Dandelion: “Yes?”
Huck: “My number is 555-0813. I think it’s time we move our relationship past Secrets.”
The catharsis I had previously felt dried up and shriveled. My gut once again returned to its normal twisted state. I signed out without saying goodbye and stared at my screensaver for a good ten minutes. Huck was supposed to stay behind the screen. He was supposed to stay anonymous.
A number changed that. A number was decidedly intimate. I knew all of this, but I still found myself punching the digits into my phone.
