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“You’re right,” he confessed as a mixture of tears and rain streamed down his sullen face. “I did lie to you.”
“Yeah, no shit,” she replied in disgust, refusing to look at the man who stood weeping in the dim mist. Anger coursed through her veins, yet she found tears welling in her eyes as hate and love collided inside of her. “Just go,” she said with her voice trembling in emotion.
“I should have told you that I was married,” Devon blurted, taking a step closer to her. “Was married.”
“Sure. No record of divorce, Devon. I checked. I’m not an idiot, you know,” Eva scowled as she inched her way towards the building’s front door to escape the escalating rainfall.
“That’s because we didn’t get divorced,” Devon said with the sadness in his eyes growing noticeably.
“I know,” Eva growled. “I found a website that was updated pretty recently and it lists you as still married. I guess you conveniently forgot to tell me, right?”
“I’m not responsible for the content on some random website that doesn’t get its facts straight,” Devon argued, his tired eyes now red and puffy and his suit drenched from the rain. Eva stood under the eave of the building, shielded from the i
ncreasing drizzle as he took another step towards her. “And she’s not with me anymore,” he said softly.
“Let me guess. You left her, right?” Eva asked sarcastically. Devon lowered his head yet she could see the look of pain cross his face, his tears now indistinguishable from the rain.
“I didn’t leave her side,” he replied solemnly, his voice low. After a long pause he added, “She left mine.”
“Oh, what, did she find out about me?” Eva laughed. “Am I supposed to feel bad for you?”
“She left me five years ago,” Devon answered as he raised his head. His face was filled with a deep sorrow and his far away eyes were clearly recalling some painful memory. He seemed so gentle and sincere, just as he always did, but Eva remained wary as she listened to him go on.
“By the time we realized how sick she was, it was already too late. The cancer spread through her body so quickly she was gone in less than a year,” Devon recounted with a troubled face. For the first time, the man she’d known as strong and powerful looked weak and powerless as he stood trembling in the rain. Eva’s heart sank at the sight of him, her eyes flooding with tears at his hurt. In that moment she knew this man was telling her the truth, and that the pain he was feeling was very real. Burley sat by her side, his gaze bouncing from Eva to Devon and back again as he read their body language with a look of concern and impatience.
“Devon, I… I didn’t know. I’m so sorry,” Eva sobbed as she covered her mouth in shock, her cheeks now stained with rivulets of cheap mascara and eyeliner. In the four days she’d spent mulling over the various reasons for his deceit, him being a widower had never crossed her mind. She could tell by how utterly destroyed he looked that this wasn’t some story he’d concocted to trick her back into bed. No, the drenched and defeated man standing before her was as honest as they came and how horribly she’d misread the situation, and treated him in the process, flooded her with shame. She’d acted like an irrational child by giving him the silent treatment instead of offering him a chance to explain himself. She thought he’d demolished the wall around her heart, but apparently a few bricks had remained and they were all it took for her to self-destruct.
“Don’t apologize. I should have told you. I wanted to, but… I guess I was just scared. I didn’t want you to think I was broken or something, you know? I wanted you to see me as this strong, stable, successful guy. Not like this,” he gestured at himself. He sniffled and wiped the tears from his eyes, a look of embarrassment on his face as he spoke softly while shaking his head in disappointment. “God, I’m so pathetic, right? Look at me. I’m a mess.”
“No, Devon, you’re not,” Eva said compassionately as she stepped down the stairs into the rain and took his hand in hers. “You’ve been through a lot. It’s okay. You don’t have to hide things from me. You don’t always have to be this big, tough guy. You don’t do a good job of it anyway,” she joked.
“No?” he chuckled back, his eyes beginning to brighten. Guiding him with one hand and Burley’s leash in the other, she led Devon back up the stairs and out of the rain. As they stood under the building’s eave, water trickling down around them, Eva reached up and tenderly placed a hand on his cheek.
“You’re a sensitive guy, Devon. I’ve known that from day one. And you know what? There’s nothing wrong with that. In fact, it’s one of the things I like about you,” she smiled sweetly.
“Thank you,” he replied, his wet hair matted to his head. “My wife used to joke that my heart is as big as my arms,” he chuckled as he remembered her words and fought back another wave of tears. He paused to swallow and recompose himself while Eva remained silent, giving him all the time he needed as she held onto his hand.
“What happened?” she asked when she felt he was ready.
“When she died,” he began slowly, “I couldn’t handle it. We met in one of the foster homes I landed in after my parents died. I was seventeen and she was fifteen. We instantly became best friends, but we got separated when I was shipped off to another home. We kept in touch every day, and as soon as she turned eighteen we ran to the courthouse to get married. Since she didn’t have any family either, we didn’t feel the need to have an actual wedding. No guests, nothing like that. We just went to the courthouse and that was that. We were so in love, Eva,” he paused to once again regain is composure. “We were so in love,” he reiterated, “and we just wanted to spend the rest of our lives together. We shared the same dreams, and with my grandfather’s money we were going to do good things. Give people better lives. We worked hard doing just that. And we shared nine wonderful years together before she got sick. When she passed, I lost my mind. I holed up in my grandfather’s estate and kind of became a hermit. It took me two years to even start going out again.”
“Oh, Devon,” Eva’s lips quivered as she held back tears. “I can’t even imagine…”
“The business took a major hit, to say the least,” Devon explained. “We started it together, and without her by my side it just wasn’t the same. I lost all desire to continue on, to be honest. Remember when I told you my properties only recently starting turning a profit?”
“Yes,” Eva answered, remembering back to their first date at Burger World.
“Yeah, that might have been a lie. My entire business is fucking hemorrhaging money,” he chuckled before sniffling and wiping another tear from his eye. “I suck as a businessman. I have no idea what I’m doing. I wear nice suits and occasionally hit up a fancy restaurant to try and look the part, but my heart just isn’t in it anymore. Truth be told, my wife was the one with the business savvy and she was pretty much the brainchild of the entire operation. I’ve been lost without her,” he confessed as a stray tear made its way down his face.
“You know I don’t care about money, Devon,” Eva reminded him as she released his hand and wiped his cheek dry with her delicate thumb.
“I know you don’t,” he said with a heavy sigh. “And that’s one of the reasons I care about you so much. Most women only see me as a walking moneybag. You think you’re defensive? Try being me,” he laughed. “When I first met Marie, she had no idea how much I was worth. I didn’t tell her about the inheritance until we were already a couple. Over the last two years I’ve thought about dating, but it’s just so damn hard. Women care about my bank account, not who I am as a person,” he pointed at his chest to drive the point home, his big, blue eyes still full of hurt.
“I guess I never thought of it that way,” Eva replied as she took his hand in hers again. Since meeting this man, she’d never considered how hard dating must be for him. The entire time he’d been every bit as defensive as her, he’d just been better at hiding it. Burley had grown bored with their conversation and had laid down on the stoop to watch the rain falling onto the uneventful street. “I’ve been selfish and I hate myself for how I’ve treated you. I’ve never once put myself in your shoes. I guess I just assumed since you had money that life was easy for you.”
Devon watched her with a sort of fascination as she spoke. Eva had never met anyone so captivated by her every word, and she was very much flattered by it. There was something deeper and more genuine about him than any man she’d ever met before. He’d been so good to her when all she’d done from the day they’d met is misjudge him and make false accusations. Despite this, he’d still been patient with her and that kindness is what she admired about him the most. He was so much more than good looks, muscles, and money. His heart truly was as big as his arms, and she vowed to show him the patience and understanding he’d shown her.
“You’re the first real girl I’ve met, and you knocked me off my feet,” Devon said as his spirit lifted and he flashed her a warm smile. “You didn’t care about my money and it actually seemed to be a turn-off to you,” he laughed. “Plus you didn’t walk out on me when I took you for a greasy burger at a cheap fast-food joint!”
