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Sophy sucked in a sharp breath. ‘Was...was there any suggestion it wasn’t?’
Apollo’s face was expressionless. ‘They have to look at everything. You’d just arrived on a flight from London that morning. Sasha picked you up from the airport?’
Sophy nodded.
‘Yes.’ Her voice sounded raw.
Apollo said, ‘We can do this later, or tomorrow.’
She shook her head again. ‘No, I know you have questions and you deserve answers.’
She steeled herself but wasn’t prepared when Apollo said, ‘I’m sorry for your loss, Sophy. I know what it’s like to lose a sibling. I might not have liked Sasha very much but she was your sister and you must have loved her.’
Sophy couldn’t stop the tears that sprang into her eyes. She stood up and fished a handkerchief out of the pocket of the dress. She went over to the other window and gathered herself.
Apollo said from behind her, ‘We really don’t have to do this now.’
Sophy swallowed down her emotion and turned around when she felt more composed. ‘No. It’s okay. Really.’
She said, ‘I know Sasha was...a difficult person. More than anyone. But I did love her. I owed her a lot...’
Apollo frowned. ‘What are you talking about?’
She looked at him. ‘When I was eight, I contracted leukaemia. I needed a bone-marrow transplant. Because we were identical twins, Sasha’s bone marrow matched mine so she was asked to donate her marrow.’
Apollo said nothing so she went on, ‘She had no choice really, and she never forgave me for having to go through the painful donor procedure without the benefit of actually being sick and getting the attention. I think, unconsciously, I spent my life making it up to her.’
Sophy had never really analysed that before now but something clicked into place inside her as if finally she was acknowledging the role she’d given her sister out of a misplaced sense of guilt.
Apollo said, ‘That must have been traumatic. The illness.’
Sophy made a face. ‘A lot of it has faded with time. In a way, Sasha’s constant demand for attention helped to distract from the memories...
‘She was never content with what she had. She lied about our parents to people, friends in school. They were too boring for her. Our father was a postman and our mother was a part-time secretary for the local doctor’s office. We had a perfectly happy home life, albeit modest. The worst thing that happened was that they both died within a year of each other, when we’d just left school. My father had a heart attack and then my mother contracted breast cancer.
‘After they died, Sasha wanted to move up to London to make her mark. She’d never been happy in our little town. I went with her because the truth is I felt lost without her. She’d been the dominant one for so long.’
Sophy looked away from Apollo as she admitted that. She’d let Sasha dominate her, a dynamic they’d played out since they were children, exacerbated by her illness.
Apollo asked, ‘Why is your name different from hers if you’re sisters? Her name is Miller on her passport and papers.’
Sophy forced herself to look at him again. He was frowning. ‘Sasha took our mother’s maiden name, changed it legally—she thought it sounded more interesting than Jones. She did it when she was going through a phase of wanting to be an actress.’
Apollo paced away and back, and then stood at the window for a moment with his back to Sophy. It all made sense in a sick kind of way. He’d met Sasha. He could attest to her ruthless deviousness. If anything, he suspected that Sophy hadn’t really acknowledged half of what her sister had been capable of. The woman had tried to seduce him so she could try and get pregnant for real.
Her childhood illness... It tugged on him deep inside. Imagining a small girl with huge blue eyes and light red hair losing that hair because of chemotherapy. Being subjected to all manner of invasive procedures.
To counteract the sense of sympathy he felt, Apollo turned around again. Sophy’s chin was tipped up, as if she was mentally preparing for the next onslaught. He pushed down the surge of something more than sympathy. He needed to know.
‘That night in London. Why did you pretend to be your sister?’
Sophy’s insides clenched with guilt. ‘Because I wasn’t meant to be there. I work—worked—as a receptionist in a solicitor’s office. Sasha asked me to cover for her. She was double-jobbing at another event. It wasn’t unheard of for me to cover for her like that. I didn’t tell you my real name afterwards because I was afraid she’d get into trouble and lose her job with the event company.’
He frowned. ‘Why didn’t you tell me the following night when I took you for dinner? When we slept together?’
How could she explain how overwhelming it had been for a man like Apollo to show interest in her? Mousy Sophy. She lifted a hand and let it drop. ‘I should have told you...but I couldn’t believe that you wanted me. Sasha was the one who was confident. Glamorous. Not me.’
She shrugged minutely. ‘Somehow it felt more appropriate to be her...not me.’
