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“Why?”
She comes over to me.
“Why this?”
She leans in and kisses me. I kiss her back. It’s been long enough that we’ve been even somewhere safe together that it feels strange and new to hold her. And I’m not used to her being Chihiro yet. It feels a little like I’m cheating on Candy. But she is Candy. This whole thing is going to take a while longer to get used to.
When she lets go of me she steps back and laughs.
“What?” I say.
“You have lipstick all over yourself. Hold it.”
She gets a napkin from the Donut Universe bag and wipes my lips. Which, with perfectly lousy timing, is when Fairuza decides to walk in. She’s a Lurker. A Ludere. Blue-skinned, blond, and sporting a small pair of Devil horns. She knew Candy for a long time. She played drums in Candy’s band back before she “died.”
Fairuza takes a DVD from her bag and slams it down on the counter. Walks over and slaps me hard enough it feels like hornets are having a hoedown on my cheek.
“Candy’s barely gone you’re already with this little bitch? Fuck you.”
She starts to hit me again, but I get my arm up and her hand glances off.
“Fairuza,” says Kasabian.
She turns and stabs a finger at him.
“And fuck you too for hanging around with this asshole. Is this the bitch he gave Candy’s guitar to? Yeah, I heard about that. Fuck all of you.”
She heads for the door and slams it hard enough I half expect the glass to crack.
Candy takes a step back and hands me the napkin. I wipe the last of the lipstick off my face myself.
“I’ve got to tell her,” says Candy.
“No, you don’t. The more people that know, the more dangerous this gets. Let her hate me. I can live with that.”
“Goody for you,” says Kasabian. “What about me? She’s never going to speak to me again as long as I’m here with you two.”
“What are you worried about? I thought you broke up.”
“We did,” he says. “But at least we were friends and . . . I don’t know. Maybe there was some chance of getting back together. Now, though . . .”
I put my hands out like a goddamn preacher.
“No one tells Fairuza or anybody else. We are on thin fucking ice. One mistake and Candy ends up in a federal pen. It’s too much of a risk.”
“What about me?” says Candy. “Okay, some people are going to think you’re an asshole for being around Chihiro, but you still get to be you. I’m no one.”
I hadn’t really thought of that.
“Look, I’m still trying to get my brain around all this too. Maybe down the line it would be safe to let a couple of more people know. But we’ve got to play this out for a while. Chihiro didn’t even exist a couple of weeks ago. You stick out. Let people get used to you. Then maybe we can think about letting other people in.”
Candy thinks for a minute.
“I’ll give it till the end of January. Then I’m talking to Fairuza. I’m not asking you. I’m telling you.”
“Fine. But she’s the only one for the time being.”
“I guess.”
