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ave to admit I've never been bored around you,” she said.
“This isn't a joke, B.J. You could have been hurt. Or—”
“But I wasn't,” she said, turning her hand to grip his. “Because I can take care of myself.”
“I couldn't take it if anything happened to you.” His voice sounded strained, as if he were forcing the words out through a tight throat.
Hope knotted inside her own throat, threatening to choke her. “Maybe this is a good time for me to collect on that debt.”
He pushed an unsteady hand through his overlong hair. “What do you want?”
“One completely honest answer,” she whispered.
Looking as though he would rather she had demanded a kidney, he pushed away from her and rose to his feet. “I'm not playing games with you.”
Staying where she was, she gazed up at him. “Good. I'm very serious. You said you owed me—and that's all I want from you. Just one answer.”
He sighed. “Fine. Get it over with.”
Not very encouraging, she thought, studying his set shoulders and braced feet. Maybe he thought she would lose her nerve if he was forbidding enough.
He should have known her better.
Clinging to the memory of the expression in his eyes when he had said he couldn't take it if she were hurt, she drew a deep breath and blurted, “Do you love me?”
She thought at first that he wasn't going to answer, despite his agreement. He kept his back half-turned to her when he finally said, “Yes.”
No elaboration. No qualification. And no encouragement, she couldn't help noting. He had given her exactly what she'd asked for and nothing more.
Still, it gave her more reason to hope….
“Will you give us a chance?”
“It wouldn't work,” he said, his voice so low she had to strain to hear him. “I'm no good at that sort of thing. I travel too much. And I know how hard it is to be married to someone in my line of work, never knowing from one day to the next whether you're going to be a widow.”
“That would be difficult for me,” she admitted. “But I could learn to deal with it if you're committed to your job. I would never ask you to leave it for my sake.”
“It's all I know how to do. I'm not fooling myself that I make that big a difference in a world where three more scumbags pop up whenever we put one behind bars. But at least I can say I tried to make things a little better, one bust at a time.”
“Like Uncle Jared and his foster boys—helping a few out of the many who are in trouble. I hope you can forgive me for saying you were more like Judson Drake than Jared Walker. That was a low blow—and so very wrong.”
He shook his head forcefully. “I'll never be the man Jared is. Some of the things I've done…”
“Daniel.” She rose then, moving to face him fully. “Didn't you listen to any of our family history while you were with us? When Jared's siblings finally located him, he was in jail. He was a drifter who had been arrested for an armed robbery he didn't commit, leaving his young son alone on the streets until Cassie found him and helped him clear Jared's name.
“Despite the way the rest of the family pretty much idolizes him, Jared is the first to deny that he's anyone's hero. He calls himself a simple cowboy with a knack for taming horses and teenage boys. A man with flaws and emotional baggage from being raised by an alcoholic father and a mother who died much too young—not to mention spending the rest of his youth in foster homes and his early adulthood trying to find a place for himself. Now he's chosen to try to make a difference in the world, a little at a time. Don't tell me you aren't like him, Daniel. I know better.”
He looked stunned, though he was still shaking his head. “Don't—”
“I'm not confusing you with him. I haven't been looking specifically for a man like Jared, though I've always admired him, so it isn't surprising I would fall for someone who reminds me of him in some ways. I'm in love with you, Daniel Andreas or Castillo or Lopez or Smith—whatever you call yourself, whatever you do for a living. And I won't stop loving you even if you send me away again. I'll just spend the rest of my life missing you.”
“You deserve better.”
“You're right. I do,” she replied steadily. “And you deserve better than what you've had, too. You deserve a real home. Someone who loves you for exactly who you are rather than the roles you've played for so long. A chance to forgive yourself for things you had no control over. So what are you going to do about it?”
He heaved a long, weary-sounding sigh that might have signaled surrender. “How do you feel about answering to Mrs. Andreas again? I'd rather not go back to Castillo, since I left that part of my life behind a long time ago.”
She should have been expecting something like that, considering that Daniel had a habit of giving her no warning before doing something that knocked the breath completely out of her. After taking a moment to steady herself, she replied, “I could get used to it.”
