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“You’ll never lose that.”
She wished she could count on that, but sadly, she knew better.
Reading her expression, he sighed. “Stop lumping me in with all those other guys, Kim. If you’re going to shoot me down, do it because of my own shortcomings, not for someone else’s.”
“It has nothing to do with shortcomings. You’re a very special man, Tate, and if I had no other obligations, I would… But I have to put Daryn first,” she said firmly. “You of all people should understand why I refuse to risk disrupting her life.”
Tate scowled. “So you’re never going to date again? You don’t think your daughter would expect her mother to have needs of her own?”
“All I need for myself is to be a good mother and a good therapist.”
Tate’s low snort held both skepticism and annoyance. “Very noble. And very full of hot air.”
She gasped in outrage. “I was being entirely honest.”
“Not even with yourself,” he contradicted. “You want and need a hell of a lot more than that in your life. You’re just afraid to go for it. With good reason, maybe, but it’s still based on fear, not logic.”
She looked away from him, keenly aware that they stood on her porch with cars passing on the street and her brother and daughter waiting in the house behind her. “This isn’t the time or place for this conversation.”
“No.” He looked vaguely regretful. “I should have waited. Like I said, I can’t seem to be anything but completely up-front with you. Before this weekend, I was able to mask my feelings for you—maybe even from myself—but now I can’t imagine never being with you again as more than lunch pals. I can’t fathom seeing you for an hour once a week across a restaurant table, not seeing you or hearing from you in between. Never spending time alone with you again, touching you, kissing you.”
His voice had deepened as he finished, and Kim shivered a little in response to the sexy rumble. It would be so easy to take the short step that separated them, to wrap herself around him and lose herself in him again. Everything he said resonated within her—but it had not escaped her attention that not once during that impassioned speech had he mentioned her daughter.
She swallowed hard. “Just give it time, Tate. Once we’ve put this weekend completely behind us, you’ll be relieved that I, at least, didn’t get carried away with it all. You know you don’t really want to get involved with a single mother. You said to Evan only a couple of hours ago that being solely responsible for Daryn would scare the stuffing out of you.
“Well, the thing is, Daryn and I come as a package. If I were looking for a relationship with anyone—which I’m not—it would be someone who isn’t afraid of long-term commitment and parenthood. Since I’m not sure anyone like that even exists anymore, I’m going to stick with my policy, despite what happened last night.”
“I know Daryn complicates things, but—”
She took a step back from him, her chin rising. “My daughter is not a complication.”
“Poor choice of words,” he said, raising a hand in a gesture of apology. “I didn’t mean it quite that way.”
“I have to get back inside and put
her to bed. Good night, Tate. Maybe I’ll see you at lunch Wednesday.”
Barely giving him time to begin a response, she whirled and stepped through the door, closing it behind her with a snap. Or was that the sound of her heart breaking, when she had done everything she knew how to protect it from that?
Looking as though he’d hardly moved a muscle, Stuart was still on the couch, his eyes focused on the baby.
“She’s still asleep,” he reported unnecessarily.
“Thank you for watching her. Did you reach Bob?”
“Yeah. I told him I’m here with you. He said he was glad I’m safe. He wants me to come to the house tomorrow afternoon and talk with him and Mom, but I said I’d have to think about it. I told him I’m moving out, and he said he’d go with me to the school housing office if I want him to. He even said he’d help out with some expenses, even though I know he’s got his own kids to take care of.”
Kim was relieved that Bob seemed to be supporting Stuart’s decision. Even if it was just because Bob was ready for his stepson to move out of the house, at least he seemed willing to help. “I think this will work out fine for you, Stuart. I know you’ll do well in school. You won’t regret going.”
“I don’t mind so much going to school,” he admitted. “I just didn’t want to live at home any longer.”
She smiled a little. “Yes, I think you’ve made that clear.”
He cleared his throat, and she thought he looked a little abashed. She hadn’t meant to embarrass him with her teasing. She supposed he just didn’t know her well enough to read her clearly yet. It was long past time to remedy that situation.
“I’m going to put Daryn to bed,” she said, moving toward the baby. “After that, you and I can have some herbal tea or something and talk for a while before bedtime. You’ll be sleeping on the couch, I’m afraid.”
“I don’t mind the couch. I’ll go out and get my bag while you take care of her.”
