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The corner of Cass’s mouth tilts, curling into something sinister, especially with the mask on his face. His hand shoots out suddenly, gripping me in much the same way as Paulo did earlier, but this time, this time, I’m burning with both fear and need. “Sorry?” The sneer that graces his handsome face twists my gut into a knot that makes it difficult to breathe. “Do you think that will fix what you said about me?”
My mouth opens, then closes because, to be honest, no, I don’t think it will fix anything between us. But even as his fingers dip against my skin, I know there’s no other man who can make me feel like he does.
“There is nothing you can say or do that will fix what you told your parents I did, especially in your father’s eyes.” His words slam right into my chest, and it makes it hard to breathe.
“I-I didn’t…” Words fail me because there is nothing I can tell him that could fix us. Fix what I did.
“You didn’t mean to fuck my life into the ground with your lie? My father had me in therapy after you left. I spent months trying to convince him that I wasn’t some junkie addict,” Cassian spits angrily, leaning into me, his body so close, I can feel him vibrate with rage. His fingers dig into my throat, and I’m so thankful we’re alone, hidden from the crowd. “Is that why you’re back now, with that fancy man on your arm to show me just how well you’re doing without me?”
My mouth once again falls open, but no words come out. How can I tell him how much I cared when I nearly shattered his life to pieces? Thankfully his father has sway in this town and was able to squash the claims I made.
“Paulo has nothing to do with this, with us,” I bite out. I don’t know why I’m defending a man who’s holding me hostage, but I want to show Cassian I’m stronger than he thinks. Even though the truth is so far from what he can see. “I came home because I needed to do what my father had asked of me.”
“Oh? I’m sure that’s all that’s brought you back here. Or was it because you wanted to see if I’d finally fuck you?” The evil glint in his eyes is nothing like the Cassian I had come to know, come to love. This man before me is different. When he was younger, there was always happiness in his gaze; now, there’s merely a ghost of the boy I remember.
“Fuck you, Cassian,” I bite out through clenched teeth, but he only chuckles because I’m sure he can see just how much I do want him—to touch me, to kiss me, and yes, to fuck me. Shaking my head, I glance out the window and focus on the garden behind him before I sigh. “There is so much more to what happened that night,” I tell him, hoping he’ll allow me to explain.
“Were you that obsessed with me you lied and told them I wanted you too? That I would give you something to keep you high so I could get in a quick fuck?” He throws the words at me, slicing a gaping hole in my chest. I can’t be angry, though. I was the young girl following him around like a lost puppy. But then again, he was always there for me to run to.
Cassian pushes me away, releasing my neck from his grip. He spins on his heel and glares at me from over his shoulder. I know I deserve this because I started it. I agreed when my father accused him of something heinous. I should’ve stopped it. I could have, but I didn’t.
I was guilty.
I was embarrassed.
And I fucked up.
“I didn’t mean to,” I finally whisper, but Cassian only shakes his head at my admission. “I really didn’t.” This time, I’m up on my feet, finding courage I didn’t think I had. When I reach for Cassian, he shies away from me, but the moment my fingertips land on his arm, the electric current between us is nothing short of cataclysmic.
He doesn’t realize that I didn’t actually say anything that night. He was always there for me, and I was nothing more than a child with issues.
My parents couldn’t deal with it. That night they asked, they forced me to say something, to give them a truth I didn’t want to. In my stupidity, in my swirling mind, I admitted to a lie—I screamed my agreement at Dad before I realized what I had said, and now I must live with the consequences. I look at Cassian then and finally voice the truth, “I didn’t mean to say—”
Cassian spins on his heel, his eyes latching onto mine, holding me hostage as he glares at me. “I don’t want to hear your excuses, Kalyn.” His jaw clenches, rage simmering just below the surface of those ocean eyes. “After everything we’ve been through, I’ve always been a gentleman to you, and yet, you throw me under the bus because your fucking high was far too fucking sweet to come down from.”
