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That gesture...
‘Tell me why, Calypso. Give me a reason why you won’t even hear me out,’ I challenged, feeling the ground slip away beneath my feet even as I rose and faced her across the dinner table.
* * *
‘Why?’ he grated again when words failed to emerge from my strangled throat in time to answer his question.
His features were changing from a determined sort of cajoling to frighteningly resolute.
‘Are you pregnant?’ he added hoarsely, and there was a blaze of what looked like hope in his eyes as they dropped to my stomach.
‘What? No, I’m not pregnant,’ I blurted, dropping my hand.
Was that disappointment on his face?
‘Can we take a breath and discuss this rationally?’ he asked.
The desire to do just that—to let him talk me into dreaming about an impossible future—was so heart-wrenchingly tempting it took the sharp bite of my nails into my palm to stop agreement spilling from my lips.
‘No. I’m all talked out, Axios. All I want now is action. For you to stick to your word and...and let me go.’
His grey eyes went molten for a handful of seconds before his jaw clenched tight. ‘Why? We’ve proved in the last few weeks that we’re completely compatible. As parents to Andreos. And in the bedroom.’
Desperately, I shook my head. ‘We...we can love Andreos as much together as apart. As for the bedroom...it’s just sex. Basing a marriage on it is delusional.’
‘I beg to differ. The kind of compatibility we have is unique. Don’t be so dismissive of it. Besides, how would you know? I’m the only lover you’ve ever had,’ he tossed in arrogantly.
And he would be the only one for me. ‘That still doesn’t mean I want to give up everything for the sake of—’
A throat clearing on the edge of the terrace interrupted me. Sophia, now Andreos’s official nanny, had travelled with us to Thailand, and she looked supremely nervous.
‘What is it?’ Axios demanded.
‘There’s a call from Switzerland for Kyria Xenakis. They say they’ve been trying to reach you.’
I felt the blood draining from my face as Axios frowned. Dr Trudeau, tired of waiting for me to contact him.
‘Tell them I’ll call back tomorrow,’ I said hastily.
The second Sophia hurried away, Axios’s gaze sharpened on me. ‘Why are you getting a call from Switzerland?’
‘I still have business there,’ I replied, hoping he’d let it go.
For a terse moment I thought he’d push, but then he sighed. ‘What were you going to say before? For the sake of what, Calypso?’
For the sake of unrequited love.
Mercifully, the words remained locked deep inside me, the only hint spilling out in my strained voice as I fought to remain upright, to fight for this vital chance to do this on my own terms.
‘I can’t—I don’t want anything long-term. I want to be free.’
To fight for the chance to return whole. Even to dream of starting again with a clean slate.
Hope dried up as Ax’s face turned ashen, his eyes darkening with something raw and potent. Something I wasn’t sure I wanted to decipher, because it resembled the helpless yearning inside me.
But that couldn’t be. Axios not only hated what my father had done to him, he despised what my family had done to his grandfather. I was the last person he could be contemplating hitching himself to for the long term. Which meant that whatever his proposal was it still had an end date. That even if Dr Trudeau had a sliver of hope for me I might not have a chance with Ax.
Nonetheless, temptation buffeted me until I had to hold on to the edge of the table to keep from falling into it.
