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‘Learning from it is one thing. Shutting yourself off from experiencing anything else is another.’
‘Dio mio. I’m trying to protect you, Maddie.’ His voice was harsh. Ragged.
Her heart wanted to soften, to give in, but what would she be giving in to? A half-dead platonic marriage when she’d had a taste of how things could be if only he opened his heart?
‘You can’t control the future, Remi. No one can. You think you’re protecting me, but what you’re doing is insulating yourself from living a full life. I... I don’t want that.’
His eyes narrowed. ‘What does that mean?’
‘It means you can’t keep me in a cage, no matter how much you think you’re justified in doing so.’
‘You are a princess now. In a matter of weeks you’ll be my queen. Like it or not, your new position means that in some ways you’re constrained by your station. You can’t do whatever you want, give in to frivolous dreams.’
‘But I don’t have to live in misery either, locked away in your Amber Palace. I won’t play the out-of-sight-out-of-mind game with you.’
He dragged a hand through his hair, upsetting the neat strands. ‘Dio, none of this is a game. You could be pregnant.’
Her insides shook at the words, at the soul-shaking possibility, but she stood her ground. ‘Even if I am, the last I heard pregnancy wasn’t a prison sentence.’
‘But it carries risks.’
‘Walking down the street carries risks. I have first-hand knowledge of that, but I’m still here. Still alive. What if I’m not pregnant?’
His lips compressed. ‘No protection is risk-free. And since I’ve proved conclusively that my control is...lacking where you’re concerned, it’s best if we—’
‘Don’t you dare say it!’ she blurted, distress shaking her voice.
His face closed completely. ‘You will remember who you’re addressing, Maddie. It’s pointless to argue. My mind is made up. This is still only a marriage of convenience, which required consummation to make it lawful. Now we’ve done our duty there’ll be no further intimacy between us.’
And just like that the loud clang of dungeon gates echoed, consigning the marriage she’d dared to hope she could have to a dark and lonely death.
She lifted her chin and looked him in the eyes. ‘Very well, Your Highness. Since you don’t need my permission to leave, I guess if I don’t see you around I can assume you’re gone.’
‘Maddie—’
‘If there’s nothing else, I think I’ll go and get acquainted with my new residence. I’m assuming, again, that your offer of a tour now falls to someone else?’
He gave a brisk nod. ‘I have work to do.’
‘Then don’t let me keep you,’ she replied stiffly.
He stayed exactly where he was, staring at her for a full minute before delivering one of his imperious nods. ‘Your doctor will be in touch soon. We need to know one way or the other.’
With that, he turned on his heel and left the library.
Maddie sank onto the sofa, the breath knocked out of her lungs. And when she heard a helicopter land and then take off again half an hour later, she couldn’t stop the sob that ripped from her throat or the torrent of tears that followed.
* * *
She didn’t see Remi again for three long weeks, and although every other night she would hear him arrive in his helicopter, he would be gone by morning.
Of course, she mused bitterly. In all things he had to keep up appearances.
Maddie attempted to shrug off insidious despair in favour of getting to know her new home. After exploring every inch of the Amber Palace she spent hours in the elaborate maze, then discovered stables filled with thoroughbreds, stallions and two mares. With her pregnancy unconfirmed, Maddie could only admire them from afar as stable hands tended them.
Keeping herself busy prevented her from doing too much of the one thing that fed her despair—scouring social media for glimpses of Remi. With wedding fever abating, people were now turning their attention to the coronation. And from the looks of it, Remi was fully immersed in preparations—including touring the major cities of his kingdom.
His enigmatic responses when asked about the whereabouts of his wife had begun to fuel speculation of a possible royal baby on the way. She was therefore not surprised when he arrived with her doctor in tow on the twenty-second day.
