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‘The train, Reiko? What happened?’
She made a sound of distress, sagged against the sink and closed her eyes. ‘My father … The crash two years ago … It happened on a train in Osaka.’
Reiko heard his sharp inhalation, felt the force of his fixed gaze upon her, knew the moment he strode forward and gasped as he lifted her into his arms. With quick strides he went into the living room.
When he deposited her at the end of the sofa, she finally opened her eyes. She saw him disappear into the kitchen and return with their drinks.
Her heart hammered as he took a seat next to her. She knew with every fibre of her being that once she told him he would leave and she’d most likely never see Damion again. The thought made her heart ache. Her gaze travelled over him, avidly keeping a record of the perfection of the man sitting a mere touch away.
‘You’re breaking the rules.’ The edginess in his tone belied the lazy hand he lifted to take a sip of his drink.
‘What rules?’
‘Keeping our hands off each other until we’ve talked.’
‘But … I haven’t touched you!’
‘Ce n’est pas vrai. Your eyes are touching me as surely as your hands yearn to. But first things first. If your father died in a train crash, why do you think it was your fault?’
Her breath caught. ‘I … I forced him to go on the train. He didn’t want to. I blackmailed him into it.’
‘How?’
Reiko licked her lips, acute anxiety rolling through her at the thought of what she was about to reveal. ‘I … He wanted me to … make some changes in my life. I wouldn’t agree until he’d reconciled with my mother. They’d been separated for six months. He came to tell me he was going to divorce her. I didn’t want him to.’
A pained look crossed his face. ‘Not every marriage is destined to succeed. Sometimes walking away is the best option.’
‘I know, but these were my parents. My mother isn’t the most wifely or maternal of women, but even as flawed as she is I knew she wouldn’t survive without my father. And in his own way he loved her. He agreed to give it one more try.’
‘You were lucky. My parents stayed together and they died because of it.’
Shock rammed through her system. ‘Oh, my God. How … ? What happened?’
His gaze darkened until the grey was almost black. ‘Obsession. They were cursed by their obsession.’
She stared back at him. ‘What—?’
He waved her question away. ‘We’ll leave the sordid details of my childhood for another time. You were telling me what happened.’
Fighting the need to do something about his pain, she continued. ‘I was living in Osaka when Dad came to see me. He hated taking trains, but I insisted because driving to Tokyo where my mother was would’ve taken longer.’ The tight knot of pain that was never far away grew in her chest. ‘Twenty minutes into the journey, the train crashed in a tunnel. We were trapped for two days. My father held my hand the whole time. By the time I finally got the courage to tell him I was sorry, he was dead. When my mother found out, she blamed me. Since my accident I’ve only seen her twice.’
She wasn’t aware she was crying until Damion handed her a tissue. When he took her in his arms, the tears fell faster.
‘Are your nightmares about the crash?’
She nodded against his chest. ‘Sometimes I see him dying; sometimes I’m trapped in the twisted metal and I can’t get to him. But it’s always about the crash.’
‘If your therapist was any good, she would’ve told you, despite what your mother thinks, your father’s death isn’t your fault.’
The warm note of sympathy in his voice made her tears flow faster.
‘It doesn’t matter what anyone says. I was selfish. I couldn’t see beyond what I wanted. I didn’t want to admit that maybe they were better off without each other. Dad loved her in his own way, but I know he was only seeking the reconciliation because of me—that given the choice he’d have divorced her. I also let him believe that my lifestyle choice was in some way his fault.’
‘What lifestyle choice?’
Her heart lurched, then hammered. Reiko opened her mouth but couldn’t find the strength to utter the words. Shame raked through her.
‘What lifestyle choice?’ he asked again.
