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“You want me to tell you something about myself?”
“Why not? I’m all out in the open. There’s nothing you can tell me that will surprise me.”
She thrust a fry into her mouth, chewing. “Okay, personal.” She licked her dry lips. “I hate the way people treat me and assume I’m like my mom. Is that personal?”
“Not only do you get personal points, but it’s deep as well.”
Lilly shrugged. “It doesn’t matter. I’ve noticed it doesn’t matter how I behave. They’re always going to think the worst.”
“Have you ever talked to your mom about it?”
“Tried to. She told me she didn’t care and that I should start to follow her and not care.”
Caleb winced. “She has a little point, about the not caring what other people think.”
“Yeah. That’s what sucks. She’s not bad. She’s just focused on herself. I don’t think she should have ever had kids.”
He wanted to hold her.
“Not that I regret being born.” She groaned. “Now I sound like a pity party. That’s not what I was trying to say.”
“I get it,” he said.
“You do?”
He nodded. “You don’t not want to be alive, but you wished your mother hadn’t been so vacant.”
“Something like that. Have I made it up to you?”
“Yeah, I’d say we’re close.”
“Good. I’d hate for my new friend to think I wasn’t worth his time.”
She was so worth everything. “So, as we’re new budding friends, I think it’s only fair that I get to cook for you.”
“I don’t think that’s how friends are with each other.”
“I’ve seen it,” he said. “They have dinner parties all the time. Get together. We could have a story dinner.”
“Story dinner?”
“We’ll pick a book, read it, and then you come over, and we’ll talk about it. It’ll be only you though. No one gets to know my secret. Not even my brothers.” His mother was the only person who knew about his guilty pleasure. “What do you say?”
“I say … it actually sounds like fun. What about Aunt Betty? Can I bring her?”
Damn. “How about we see how we get on as to whether or not we chose to bring in other people?” He wanted a chance to be alone with her and to cook her dinner. Any excuse to spend more time with her.
“I like that. Sounds good.”
They settled on a book and a time. She needed time to loan the book from the library, she told him.
It would give him plenty of time to set everything up. He couldn’t wait to get her alone with him.
They finished their dinner, and Joanne was true to her word. Tiffany kept her distance, and he didn’t look in her general direction.
He offered to walk Lilly home and she accepted.
“You know if you keep doing this, I’m going to get used to the company, and all your women are going to hate me.” She nudged his shoulder with hers.
“I’m not seeing anyone. I’ve taken a vow of celibacy.” Why couldn’t he just keep his mouth fucking shut? The only woman he wanted, the only one who meant anything to him, was walking beside him.
“That’s a big deal. What made you change your feelings?” she asked.
“I … I don’t know. I guess I felt like it.” He was going straight to hell. The truth was if Lilly said she wanted to jump into bed, he’d gladly be there.
The only woman he wanted to fuck was Lilly.
He’d never felt this way. He’d been teased and even taunted by the prospect of finding a woman who wouldn’t look at him the same way, but he truly didn’t think he’d fall, and certainly not as hard. For the past year since he’d met her truly, he’d been hiding his feelings from everyone. He hadn’t been screwing anyone since he realized he wanted her, and still, the women kept on talking, spreading gossip behind his back.
“Well, if it’s something you want to do, I commend you for it. The female populace will no doubt be upset.”
“Someone else can take the hot spot. I’m sure there are plenty of men who want the challenge. What about you? Dating anyone?”
She shook her head. “No.”
“Do you have a crush on anyone?”
“No.”
Fuck!
There was zero hesitation. Not even a blush.
“I don’t have time for men in my life.”
“Apart from me.”
“Apart from you, but you’ve only been very present in my life the past couple of days. It’s nice. You’re very easy to talk to and to get along with.”
He wanted her to think about him, to imagine being in his bed. To be part of any wet dream she had.
“That’s why we’re going to be good friends.” He wanted to cringe at his own words, but they were at Aunt Betty’s house.
Caleb wanted to kiss her, to pull her into his arms, and show her how he really felt. Instead, he was the perfect gentleman, wishing her goodnight.
