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“Brielle?”
Evelyn’s green eyes settled my way, her hands rubbing my shoulders. “You okay?”
“Yes.” No. I shook my head. “I suppose I’m just still adjusting.”
Still trying to deal. Every day was a damn struggle and only got worse as the days slogged on. I had classes to trudge through, ones involving her son and when I wasn’t dealing with that issue, I had to come to terms with what had become my life. I had to come home every night and sit at an empty dining room table (yes, my furniture had finally arrived) and be by myself. I had to eat alone.
I had to think about my life.
I had to engulf myself in the reality of my situation, and like Evie knew my thoughts, she squeezed my shoulders.
“You know, there’s classes you can go to, right?” she asked me, angling a look down to my level. “You’re not the only one going through divorce, life changes, and other things.”
Life changes.
She’d put that nicely, few things I could tell my friend about my divorce. I’d signed an NDA surrounding all marital issues involving my celebrity husband, but one I could speak of had been what she referenced. She knew about my life change.
She knew about my entire world upheaving.
She had, hence why she’d been trying to get me to go out that night of the wedding. She wanted me to be a part of the world, make friends, and now, apparently wanted me to go to therapy.
“I’ll send you some information for a group I know about,” she said. “You can meet with others. Talk about it and, of course, talk to me.”
I did know I could, but how would I? I didn’t have the audacity. I mean, I’d slept with her son.
I was lying to her like I lied to myself on any given day, that I was okay, that I had moved on from things in my past.
It seemed she had two liars in her life apparently.
Chapter Twelve
Bri
I’d been surprised to see Ramses had decided to not finish out the rest of the week’s classes. There were only two, but he didn’t show for the last one like the rest of the class. I assumed he’d been the smart one and decided to put us both out of our misery by dropping the seminar, but the following week, he’d been there in the back row.
I knew because he texted through most of it.
He was casual about it, but as I was also completely aware of him, I knew exactly what he was getting up to in that back row. He had his phone out on the table, his gaze jerking over it as much as he took notes on the laptop in front of him. He took notes like the rest of the class in that way, but his cell got just as much of his attention as his notes, and that’d surprised me.
I wouldn’t say I expected to have his eyes and attention on me the entire time in class…
Actually, I did. I very much expected it because I was his teacher and he should have his attention on me. The fact we’d hooked up even more a given, as arrogant as that sounded. He’d been a frequent flier in my mind, so yes. I expected the same. Especially after that awkward-as-hell dinner and him cornering me in the hallway, him leaving me in the hallway. He’d dashed out rather quickly that day and I figured to save me, to save us from more awkwardness.
Well, in class today it seemed he’d forgotten about me. I was apparently his professor and only that when he came in and immediately started taking notes with the rest of the class. He did so at the top of the hour, his focus on only that. Of course, I did catch those dusky brown eyes on occasion, but never longer than it took for him to get the point before he was back to taking his notes or on his cell phone. He was either really into today’s lecture or doing other work, or something else out of class. That annoyed me, yes, but it made me equally sick to not have as much of his attention.
What the hell, Bri?
These feelings were completely unreasonable, of course. Completely inappropriate, I knew, but we did have a history and, yeah, he was on my mind. He was naturally since I did have runs with his mother either before or after work. When I wasn’t with him, I got to hear about him, naturally since that was Evie’s kid. None of our topics were as deep as the other day, but he made it into the conversation more than once since then.
“Can I see you in my office after class, Ramses?”
His gaze jerked up at the end of the hour, his classmates putting their note taking devices away. He’d been doing the same as well and at the sound of his name, actually looked around like he wasn’t the only one in class with his name.
Well, after he realized I was speaking to him, actually speaking and not avoiding eye contact, he nodded at me. I’d been bad about that, trying not to look directly at him, which made it even worse. It annoyed me he’d been attempting to do the same. We didn’t clash a lot, not on either of our ends.
God, I was a hypocrite.
Amongst other things, a cradle robber… well, not really. But I was a liar to a friend who’d been nothing but gracious and helpful towards me.
