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“Could have used you last fall,” she parroted, mocking me to her friends but not loud enough for Ms. Hollis’s to hear her. She never heard, going on to the other students and reporting their times to them.
Don’t breathe. Don’t feel.
Escaping the giggles, I physically escaped, heading over to the bleachers and grabbing a towel. I took the long way to the showers, the best way since no one else bothered taking the route. I was alone and gratefully when I finally made it into the locker room.
Recall went dormant again under chrome spigots, water hot enough to probably scorch the skin off most people but not me. I liked hot showers, my skin used to it after literally shower after shower this way. I did the same thing at home, well, at Rosanna’s. I was still living there after break, and not only did I shower hot, I slept with noise, so much noise. I had Hershey, my chocolate Labrador puppy, in my bed, but I wore headphones when sleeping. I played rock music as loud as I could, maybe averaging an hour or two of sleep a night. It was the best I could do most nights and better than nothing. If I slept any other way, I had dreams, dreams about train tracks and my sister’s screams.
I hadn’t even been there the night she died and I heard her, the screams agonizing.
I chilled under hot water, her voice coming for me. She called out to me no matter what the time of day, and I couldn’t stop the train. I couldn’t help her.
At least not in the conventional sense.
My sister was gone, but I was not only here and alive, I wasn’t without a means to help her. I may have lost my sister, but her truth didn’t have to be. I had to report what was going on, what truly happened to her.
I had to bring Royal Prinze down.
He was so out of line with everything, that orgy he’d been a part of only consistent. It only showed he didn’t give a fuck. Not about me or Paige. He was getting his itch scratched, and meanwhile, I was broken and my sister was dead. He didn’t have a heart.
He didn’t have a soul.
I turned under hot water, secure again in my stance. I was going to handle things the only way I knew how, and I had Ramses there to help me. He’d been burned too by the Court, and together, we were going to make waves. We had to.
Sounds told me I wasn’t alone in the showers anymore, someone else choosing to use the same dirty old showers I chose. I usually came over here after gym because the uppity bitches at this school like to use the new ones.
I turned the thing off, grabbing my towel and wrapping it around me. I didn’t see who’d joined me in the showers, and regardless, I didn’t care. Instead, I made it to my locker, immediately going for my phone when I opened it. I’d been waiting for a text message.
Nothing.
I’d been waiting on a text from Ramses for over two days now, the kid basically ghosting me all weekend. He hadn’t been without reason, though.
Where are you?
He’d had a meeting with that Court council after school the last day I saw him, something he told me in last period via text. I hadn’t even gotten to see him before he left. He simply said, Just notified they’re meeting with me tonight. Here we go…
I thought here we go indeed as I got dressed, trying my best not to freak out and worry. If something unusual went down he’d tell me something. We didn’t keep secrets from each other.
We weren’t like them.
Forcing myself to believe that, I unwrapped the towel from my body, but a buzz in my locker had me closing that towel right up. I immediately reached for my phone with thoughts of relief, but as it turned out that was fleeting. The text wasn’t from Ramses, but Birdie.
I swiped.
Birdie: Hey! Want to hang out after school?
No. I didn’t want to hang out after school. I wanted to know what the fuck was going on with Ramses. Gripping my hair, I shook that freak-out off and focused on my phone.
Me: Did you invite the guys and Ramses?
This was a possibility, and if she had heard from him, I could finally breathe again.
Birdie: I did.
Me: And?
Birdie: They’re coming.
The sigh of relief started too early, another chime bringing me back down to the ground real friggin’ quick.
