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I need to be alone.
“Fine, but I’ll be seeing a union rep over this.”
Shaking in my boots over here. Twat. “That’s your right.”
With a frustrated huff, Mike straightens his tie and stomps out of my office like a spoilt child. The door has barely closed before another knock sounds and I slam the pen I’m holding onto the desk in temper. “What?” I bark.
“Bad time?” Theodore asks, popping his head around the door.
I gesture toward the chair opposite my desk. “Not anymore.”
He tries to be subtle, but I still notice him scan Helen’s office to see if she’s there before he walks past the chair and perches himself on the edge of my desk. We haven’t officially announced our relationship, but I’m pretty certain most people here know regardless. I don’t employ stupid people.
“Have you eaten yet? You missed breakfast again,” he asks, stroking along my cheek with the back of his hand. I fake a smile and slowly shift in my seat, distancing myself. I don’t want him to touch me. It takes all my effort to tolerate it when he does. We haven’t had sex for over a week and it makes no sense because Theodore means so much to me…yet his touch feels like ants crawling over my skin.
“Yes,” I lie. “I grabbed a sandwich earlier.”
“Did you drink the Lemsip’s I bought you?”
Right. I have a ‘cold’. That’s the excuse I gave Theodore for being a little withdrawn lately. I hate that he believed me so easily. Sometimes I think I want him to push me, force me to talk to him, but he doesn’t. And why would he? He trusts me. He doesn’t know what a lying piece of scum I am.
“Yes. I feel much better.”
“You still look rough. I’ll get you some energy drinks on my way home from work. You’ve lost weight.” His fingers wander to my chin, stroking my thick stubble. “And you need to shave.”
“Did you just come here to insult me?” I snap.
“I’m worried about you. Your eyes are dark. Didn’t you sleep well?”
“I slept fine.” If anything I slept for too long. I have no energy lately. My bones ache and my head hurts. Sleep is the only thing that takes it all away.
Until I wake up.
“Get to the point, Theodore.”
“Tess called. She’s just taken a delivery for a new bed and a sofa.” He sounds angry instead of grateful.
“Oh good.” I check my watch. “They were earlier than expected.”
“You can’t do this shit without consulting me, James. I don’t need your charity.”
My eyes roll dramatically into the back of my head. “Don’t be ridiculous. We’re a couple. I’m not donating them to you. I bought them for us.”
“You don’t even live there.”
It’s like he’s flipped a switch in my brain, sending me from calm to pissed off as hell in a nanosecond. When he’s in my home, I consider it his space, too. “Then send them back,” I snap. “I’ve got bigger things to worry about than a hissy fit over fucking furniture.”
“Right. Like the business failing. More reason why you shouldn’t be wasting your money on stuff I don’t need.”
He does need it, but clearly it’s not my place, as his fucking partner, to interfere. “It’s not failing.” My tone is acidic and I’m sure my expression isn’t too friendly either. “And even if it was it’s none of your concern.”
“Of course it is. We’re a couple.”
“Only when it suits you, evidently.”
Standing, Theodore huffs and strides over to the other side of the room. “Now you’re being ridiculous.”
“Am I? If I’m so ridiculous why don’t you just leave?”
“Leave?”
“Yes. My office, my life…just go.”
“Don’t be so stupid.”
“So I’m stupid now, too?”
“I didn’t mean it like that and you know it. Stop being a dick, James.”
I’m not sure how or why this argument occurred, but I’m vibrating with anger and I can’t control it. I know I’m not being fair. I know I’m pushing him away. But I can’t stop it.
“Look,” he begins, his voice soft and gentle as he walks back towards me. “I’m sorry. I didn’t come in here to argue with you.”
When he closes in I stand from my chair, keeping distance between us. “Yes you did. You’re angry with me and you wanted me to know it.”
“I’m not angry with you.”
“Liar!” I spit, closing the gap between our bodies. “You’re angry and now you’re backing down because you don’t want to push me too far. You’re pussyfooting around me just like you always do. You think I’m unstable and it scares you.”
“James…” he tries to interrupt but I ignore him.
“What’s the matter? Huh?” With the palms of my hands, I shove him in the chest. “Are you scared I’m going to break? Snap? Hurt you? Come on, Theodore, be a fucking man and give it to me straight!”
“Stop it.”
“You’re angry! Be fucking angry! Stop being afraid of me and tell me how you feel!” I jab him again and he stumbles back a step. “Tell me dammit! Shout. Yell. Be fucking mad at me for once!”
“No.” Turning his back and stalking away, he remains calm, which pisses me off even further. “I relented because I don’t want to fight with you. I don’t like arguing, not because your reaction scares me, but because I fucking love you. Don’t start throwing your illness around because that’s no excuse for talking to me like I’m a piece of shit, and I won’t put up with that from you.”
I knew this moment would come eventually.
You’re overreacting. Apologise.
“Finally,” I say, exhaling a sarcastic laugh. “I’ll drop anything of yours from my house at your workstation tomorrow.”
“What?”
“You’re done, right? Good. Because so am I.”
“Don’t be-”
Enough now. Stop it. He’s not done anything wrong.
“Stupid? Ridiculous? Come on, Theodore, tell me what you really think.”
“I’m not leaving you. I never implied that.”
“Yeah? Well I’m leaving you!”
Stomping to my office door, I unhook my jacket from the hook and toss it over my shoulder. With my hand covering the doorknob, Theodore attempts to stop me but I drag myself out of his grip and yank the door open so forcefully it bangs into the wall.
