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Weak with relief, she picked up a teatowel that had been draped over the bar of the range door and pretended to wipe her hands on it, simply just to have something to occupy them while she composed herself enough to speak normally.
There‘s no need. It‘s fine.‘ She gave a slightly shaky laugh, As long as you‘re not trying to tell me you‘ve got some terrifying disease.‘
Of course not. I just wanted to know if there‘s a risk you could be pregnant.‘
Risk. The word jumped out at Kate as if it had been written in ten-foot-high fluorescent letters and hung with flashing lights. She was the most risk-averse person she knew, while Cristiano Maresca was someone who courted it, flirted with it. In every area except this one, apparently. He was quite happy taking his chances with death, she thought sadly. But not life.
She shook her head. I‘m on the pill. I would have said something if I wasn‘t.‘ Her hands were twisting the teatowel round and round, tighter and tighter, but she made another attempt at a laugh, trying to make it sound as if the whole subject was a matter of little consequence to her. Especially since one of the questions I asked you in the interview we did in Monaco was whether you wanted a son to carry on the Maresca name and reputation. Your answer was a resounding no, so unless anything‘s changed…‘
As she spoke he turned his back and walked across the kitchen, away from her. The clock ticked, marking out the seconds as her fate hung in the balance.
Now! a little voice in her head cried. Tell him now! But words loomed and faded in her head, and none of them seemed to connect up to make the right sentence.
It hasn‘t.‘
And with those terse, ice-edged words the tentative hope she had carried in the deepest, most secret recesses of her heart was snuffed out. She blinked, trying to swallow the boulder that seemed to have lodged in her throat, glad of the solid wood she was leaning against.
Look, I‘ve been thinking…I really must get back to Monaco tomorrow.‘
Her voice sounded a little hesitant, but otherwise astonishingly normal. I was wondering if there‘s a train or something I can get?‘
Opening the fridge, Cristiano took out a bottle of champagne. She watched him tearing off the foil with ruthless expert fingers.
I‘ll drive you.‘
Kate licked her dry lips and looked away. Oh, no, really—there‘s no need for that. You came here to ski.‘
He twisted the cork out of the bottle. His eyes met hers over the top of it and he gave a bland smile.
I didn‘t, actually. And I need to get back too. Pre-season testing starts soon, and I have to put in a lot of hours on the track before then.‘
A shadow passed over his face and he turned away abruptly, opening a cupboard behind him and taking down two crystal flutes. Kate watched him, the constant low-level desire she felt whenever she looked at him now spiked with an unbearable sadness.
How can you want to do it again? After what happened?‘
It‘s not a choice,‘ he said coldly. It‘s just what I do.‘
It doesn‘t have to be.‘ Her voice was so quiet that even in the silent kitchen it was almost inaudible.
Yes, it does.‘ His face was expressionless again as he came towards her.
Leaning past her, he turned off the heat on the stove and took hold of her wrist.
Come with me.‘
Where are we going?‘
I want to show you something.‘
And that was all it took—the low rasp of his voice and the warmth of his touch—to unleash that hot, liquid rush inside her.
Letting him lead her up the stairs, Kate felt bruised and brimful of emotion—so fragile that the slightest touch might make her dissolve. But somewhere she also felt freed. All this time she had been carrying the burden of her knowledge, wondering how to share it with him. By telling her that he still didn‘t want to be a father he had released her from that responsibility.
For now. The time would come when he would have to know, and she would be able to tell him without emotion or agenda or pressure. But that time wasn‘t now. Now was for something altogether different.
Shadows sloped across the floor as he led her into the bedroom. She was quivering with want, with need for his touch, but he didn‘t stop by the bed. Kate felt a stab of disappointment as he let go of her hand and pushed open the doors onto the balcony.
Close your eyes.‘
After the warmth of the house, the frozen air made her gasp. She tensed, trying to hold herself steady against the trembling that gripped her, which was only partly to do with the cold. She heard the clink of glass as he put down the champagne, and then jumped as she felt his fingers—cool from the chilled bottle—close around hers again and draw her forward.
The wooden balcony was icy beneath her bare feet. The bitter air made her cheeks tingle and the inside of her nose sting as she breathed in a great lungful of it. As the darkness swirled behind her closed eyelids every inch of her skin seemed suddenly exquisitely sensitive, brought alive by the sharp cold, the anticipation of his touch.
OK, you can look now.‘
Cristiano‘s voice beside her was throaty and hushed. Goosebumps rose on her arms. For a moment she squeezed her eyes shut tighter, wanting to stretch out the magic, make it last for ever.
But nothing lasts for ever, she thought with a barb of sorrow, and opened her eyes.
In the rays of the dying sun the mountains looked like fire opals, as if they weren‘t simply reflecting the light but had absorbed it and were glowing from within. The sky was a livid slash of orange, overlaid with swollen clouds of purple, black and yellow, like a bruise. It felt as if they were the only people left in the world.
It‘s…incredible,‘ she breathed, turning to look at him.
And then she noticed the square wood-panelled pool built into the balcony just beyond the doors to the bedroom. Steam was rising and swirling in the frozen air from the surface of its azure water. She gasped, bringing her hand up to her mouth as her eyes widened in surprise and delight.
A hot tub?‘
Yes.‘ He followed her over to it and wrapped an arm around her waist, pressing his lips to her neck and murmuring, Do you want to get undressed before you get in this time? Or would you like me to take you in fully clothed again?‘
A huge, shuddering ache of desire went through her, making her slump helplessly against his hard chest. She gave a low moan, tilting her head sideways to expose her neck to the caress of his lips, almost fainting with longing as his hand slipped beneath her loose top and came to rest on her bare midriff.
We can‘t undress out here…‘ she protested weakly. We‘ll freeze…‘
His low, sexy laugh sent another tide of slippery lust gushing through her.
Not if we do it quickly. And I promise you won‘t feel the cold at all in a minute.‘
She gave a high shriek as he took hold of the hem of her top and pulled it swiftly over her head. The cold rushed over her body, stealing her breath, making her breasts throb and her nipples harden and tingle.
Or was that nothing to do with the cold and everything to do with the fact that already Cristiano had undone her jeans and was pulling them down over her hips?
His hands were warm on her thighs, and she could feel the heat from his body radiating against her back. Stepping impatiently out of her jeans, she twisted round in his arms, suddenly desperate to feel his naked skin against hers. Finding his mouth with hers, she pushed up his T-shirt with one hand whilst feeling for the button of his trousers with the other.
The biting cold and the urgency of her need made her clumsy, but he was there, finishing what she‘d started, yanking off his own clothes. If her mouth hadn‘t been locked on his Kate would have shouted with triumph as he stooped and swept her up into his arms. Every inch of her was crying out for him, and as he lowered her down into the silken steaming water she couldn‘t suppress a violent shiver of bliss.
There was a seat around the edge of the pool, beneath the water. As Cristiano sat on it Kate detached her lips from his and shifted her position, so that she was facing him, straddling his legs, feeling his erection against the softness of her inner thigh.
Kate…‘
She stilled, her breath catching. Behind him the sunset was as gaudy and improbable as a painted ceiling in some baroque temple, and its fiery glow burnished his dark hair and made his beautiful torso look as if it had been cast in beaten copper. His face was in shadow, but his eyes gleamed—dark and liquid with want.
Wanting her. Now.
The knowledge was powerful enough, erotic enough, to make her insides tighten with the beginnings of one of the wrenching, devouring orgasms he gave her. She was torn between wanting to impale herself on him, screaming out her joy and need, and wanting to take it slowly, savouring every moment.
There weren‘t many left, and she would have to feed on them for a lifetime.
Water cascaded from her body as she hitched herself up on her knees, leaning into him, opening up to him. Cristiano‘s eyelids flickered for a second as beneath the water she took hold of his throbbing erection and held it for a quivering moment, before lowering herself onto him, inch by inch.
