AllFreeNovel
Share Us
To take away the worry and the pain and make her into the woman with the shy smile who had worn his shirt and brought him breakfast in bed.
To slay dragons for her.
He‘s OK,‘ he said softly, stroking his thumbs over her cheeks. Her mouth was trembling slightly. He could feel it as his lips met hers.
It was the gentlest, most tentative of kisses—a world away from the ones they had shared before, in the Casino at Monaco and the darkness of the snowy pine forests. And yet Cristiano felt the foundations of his world shift a little. In the few brief seconds that their lips were touching it was as if he had taken a step in the dark and missed his footing…
And then she was pulling away from him, stepping backwards, ducking her head so that her hair swung forward, hiding her face.
Alexander. I need to find him,‘ she said in a choked voice, grabbing his coat and boots from the back of the car. And then she was gone.
Kate walked down the beach with rapid, furious strides, welcoming the roar of the waves in her head and the bitter sting of the wind against her cheeks.
Maybe it might bring her to her senses.
Of all the stupid, self-destructive, irresponsible things to do, kissing Cristiano in the car park had to be just about the most spectacular. Or letting him kiss her, she thought with an inward groan of misery and despair. To him, something as trivial as a kiss meant nothing—an image flashed into her mind of the girls she had seen at the Monaco Grand Prix four years ago, in their hotpants and bikini tops, draping themselves over the drivers—whereas to her…
To her it was oxygen to a flame that she was trying to extinguish, fuel for a fire that would consume her if she let it take hold again. He made her lose sight of reality. Of what was important. Of Alexander.
She would never make that mistake again.
Alexander was up ahead, running down towards the sea, occasionally wheeling back on himself to look at something on the sand or leaping over a rock.
The tide was half out, and Kate‘s heart turned over, aching with love as she watched his slender legs pounding the hard sand, his dark hair ruffled by the wind.
She should have brought a hat for him, she thought anxiously. He‘d get earache, or…
He looks pretty happy.‘
Automatically she stiffened, steeling herself against the sexiness of that husky Italian drawl.
He looks cold.‘
So do you.‘
And the next thing she knew he had draped his coat over her shoulders, was taking off the whisper-soft cashmere scarf he was wearing. Hooking it around her neck, he pulled the ends of it so she was drawn closer to him, wrapping it around her. His narrow, slightly almond-shaped eyes were as warm and dark as an espresso. The heat of his body enfolded her, the scent of him filling her head.
You‘re so busy looking after Alexander you forget to look after yourself.‘
It was true, she realised. She had been so preoccupied with Alexander not wearing a coat that she‘d forgotten to put hers on. The kiss hadn‘t helped her think about practicalities like that either.
She closed her eyes. Oh, God, it was so hard, this staying strong, and she was so tired. So tired of waiting for the next disaster, being on high alert for the next life-threatening danger. So tired of fighting her feelings for him all the time.
Look, a huge jellyfish!‘
Alexander‘s voice reached her distantly, over the roar of the wind and waves. Instantly her eyes snapped open. Don‘t touch it!‘ she called back, but Cristiano was already walking across to him, covering the sand quickly with his long strides. For a moment she watched him, mesmerised by the way the wind caught his hair and flattened his shirt against him, outlining the hard contours of the body she knew so well.
The body that had brought her such pleasure…In the pool at Monaco in the warm darkness of the Côte D‘Azur night, and in the snowy silence of the Alpine chalet…Each time different, but every one so intense and exquisite that her body trembled just at her remembering…
Guiltily she jerked herself out of her mini-fantasy, and was about to follow when something stopped her. Cristiano and Alexander were both bending over the jellyfish on the sand, their faces wearing identical expressions of absorbed fascination. Cristiano had Alexander‘s hand in his, imperceptibly holding him back in case he should decide to try to pick it up…
And in that moment it struck her that for the first time in four years she wasn‘t solely responsible for her son‘s safety, or his happiness.
That, for now at least, she had someone to share the load.
The relief was almost overwhelming.
Chapter Twelve
THE tide came in, gradually covering the expanse of flat, smooth sand on which Cristiano and Alexander played chase and looked for driftwood and flat stones to skim into the waves. In the absence of a bucket and spade to build a sand-castle they had constructed an island, hollowing out a moat around it.
Cristiano had been hugely amused when Alexander suggested that they put a racetrack on it, and they had become deeply involved in planning the perfect layout of straights and corners.
Straightening up, Cristiano was surprised to see how close the sea was, and to realise that the clouds had come in, covering the sun. He smiled wryly to himself. He was someone who measured out his life, his success, in thousandths of a second, and yet he‘d been so fascinated by seeing the world through this little boy‘s eyes that he‘d completely lost track of time.
I think it‘s time we went back to your mamma, don‘t you?‘
They began to walk back to where Kate was sitting in the shelter of the cliffs. He had been aware of her all the time, wrapped in his coat, her knees tucked up and her chin resting on them as she looked out to sea.
But since he‘d been aware of her all the time he‘d been away, he guessed that was hardly surprising. Even thousands of miles apart he‘d found it impossible to stop wondering how she was, what she was doing.
At the far end of the beach a cluster of tiny greystone cottages huddled against the cliffs, as if cowering there from the pounding waves. Behind them the moors unfolded into the distance, a lonely expanse of green dotted with sheep and criss-crossed by uneven stone walls.
It was hardly the Amalfi coast, he thought sardonically, and yet there was something wild and beautiful about it. A quietness that caught you deep inside and made you want to come back. You could spend your life here and not get tired of watching the sea change colour and the shadows move across the hills.
His lips curved into a sudden self-mocking smile as he realised he wasn‘t actually thinking of the landscape at all.
Alexander stopped suddenly, tugging on Cristiano‘s arm as he bent to pick something up from the sand. It was a flat piece of grey rock, sharp and jagged, like slate.
Maybe a fossil?‘ Alexander asked hopefully.
Cristiano turned it over in his hands, pretending to consider the possibility. I don‘t think so.‘
I take it to Mummy, just in case,‘ Alexander said firmly, letting go of his hand and running forward.
Mummy! Quick, Mummy—look at this!‘ he shouted as he got closer.
Kate raised her head quickly, an expression of alarm on her face as she stumbled to her feet. Too late Cristiano realised that she‘d been asleep. There was a red mark on her cheek where it had been resting on her knees.
What?‘
The anxiety was there again, sharpening her tone. Cristiano stepped forward, taking hold of her shoulders as she swayed slightly, holding her steady. It‘s fine.
Just a stone, that‘s all‘.
He felt her relax then, becoming pliant beneath his hands. The concern that he was increasingly feeling for her instantly flared into something far less noble.
Maybe a fossil, Mummy,‘ Alexander repeated importantly. Oblivious to the sudden crackle of tension in the air, he held it out to her, his expression grave.
You check.‘
Twisting from Cristiano‘s grip, Kate took the stone, stumbling away from him to the rocks beneath the cliffs. Her heart was pounding, partly from the momentary panic she‘d felt when she‘d woken up and heard Alexander calling her like that, but mostly from Cristiano‘s touch. She could just about cope with it when she was prepared, when the barriers were in place, but he‘d caught her off guard just then, hazy with sleep, her head still filled with the images of him playing on the sand with Alexander.
She‘d watched them for a long time before she‘d closed her eyes, her heart aching as she‘d seen the joy on her son‘s face at having someone to play with him— really play, with the kind of carefree wholeheartedness that it seemed she was always too preoccupied to properly achieve. And seeing Cristiano—as beautiful as a sun-kissed god who had fallen to earth in the wrong place—standing with Alexander at the edge of the sea, the two of them outlined against the vastness of the ocean, had taken her breath away.
Gathering herself, she tapped the stone sharply against a rock until she felt it give a little, and then peeled it apart.
You‘re right—look, there it is.‘
She held it out. There on the dull grey surface was the faint but unmistakable outline of a leaf.
