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The challenge, of course, was wondering if her hug really had been as innocent as it could have been. There was no question she had felt attraction from the start. It had only grown in the days since, so she felt as if she was walking on shaky ground when trying to evaluate Jordan’s actions. But what she was feeling was only physical…wasn’t it?
CHAPTER ELEVEN
CHELSEA WAS A little scared. She liked Barton far more than she should after such a short acquaintance. It wasn’t as if she wanted to get involved with anyone. For months she’d gathered the courage to get Ron out of her life, so leaping into a relationship right away wasn’t smart. She reminded herself, once again, that Barton didn’t necessarily want to do that, either. He had been divorced for two years, but everyone moved on at a different pace. Maybe he wanted to play the field for a while…though that didn’t seem his style.
“This is a nice park,” she said. “I mostly see families here.”
“That’s one of the things that sold me on the neighborhood. It didn’t hurt that the house was in my price range since it was basically a wreck.”
“You’re kidding, your place looks terrific. On the outside, at least,” she added.
“Now it does. I poured myself into restoring both the interior and exterior for the last year and a half. It helped to focus on a specific task instead of on my life, if you know what I mean.”
“I’ve never been divorced, but I can imagine. Was it bad, what happened with you and your wife?”
“Yes. She wanted money and success and simply couldn’t adjust to being married to a teacher who was never going to set the world on fire. I guess I was too selfish to compromise.”
Chelsea wanted to ask what he could have done, given up the work he loved? “It’s nice that you don’t lambaste her,” she said hesitantly.
“What would be the point? I screwed up. When we got married, I was a stockbroker. But more and more it just seemed meaningless, so I decided to become a teacher. Now I’m never bored. But Ellyn thought she was marrying a guy who’d make a splash in the world and be able to provide a certain lifestyle. There’s no denying teachers don’t make a lot of money.”
“You just developed different priorities after you got married. That happens. It isn’t as if you set out to hurt her.”
“I suppose. She hung in for a while, but couldn’t adjust.”
“I’m sure your students are glad you became a teacher.”
He grinned. “Some of the time. Tests and homework are rarely popular.”
“I guess no teacher is loved all of the time, but I had several who made a difference in my life. And I wish I’d applied more of what one of them used to say.”
“What was that?” Barton asked.
“She would quote Eleanor Roosevelt about no one being able to make you feel inferior without your consent. I didn’t really get it at the time, but I do now.” If she’d remembered that bit of wisdom when Ron had been picking her confidence apart, she might not have wasted so much time being miserable.
“That’s one of Eleanor’s best. From what I’ve read, she learned that after experiencing a lot of pain.”
“But doesn’t it also mean that some things are partly our own fault?”
“In a way, I suppose,” Barton said. “I don’t think it’s something to beat ourselves up about, though. The trick is to learn and move on.”
“Right.” That was what she needed to remember—not to let it happen again. “So, is it okay for someone to make us feel better without our consent?” she asked.
Barton winked. “That’s a serious problem, but it might be forgivable, as long as we don’t let it happen too often. Say, no more than several times a day.”
“Sounds about right.” She was glad that he’d taken the cue on lightening the conversation.
They were passing behind the dugouts at the baseball field and the players inside started waving.
“Hey, Barton,” one kid called, “you wanna play?”
“Sorry, not tonight,” Barton told him.
Another boy rolled his eyes. “I told you he wouldn’t, not when he’s with a girl.”
