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She rolled her eyes. “Yeah, well, you seem to flip that switch somehow. You sure you want a slave?” As soon as the words left her mouth, she wanted to take them back. Way to sound desperate. She didn’t even know if he felt anything more toward her than an obligation to save her from her stupidity.
“I’ve had submissives of all kinds over the years. Unfortunately, my needs are pretty specific. It’s just who I am.” He almost seemed sad about it. Banner—a god among men—sad about the way he was born? It was laughable. Then again, naturally good-looking people often didn’t know how lucky they were.
“But, why a slave? Do you just want someone servicing you all the time? Like a free maid that you screw every night?”
His eyes narrowed, and she wanted to kick herself. She’d gone too far. Instinctively, her gaze dropped. “I’m sorry,” she said. “I didn’t mean that.”
“Yes, you did.” He didn’t sound angry, but she didn’t know him well enough to be sure.
Hesitantly, she lifted her eyes.
His silence dared her to say more. “I’m just confused,” she hedged. “Slavery is such a yucky word. I don’t understand the dynamic. Why would anyone relatively sane want that?”
His chuckle was humorless. “Thanks.”
“You know what I mean.”
With a sigh, he hung his head back for a moment before answering. She knew that look. She’d been on the receiving end of it before. Why, oh why, Kate, must you ask so many questions? Her aunt used to give her that same look.
“As a Dom, there’s nothing more satisfying than having a woman’s absolute trust and adoration. There’s a high that comes with being given that power. As a Master, it’s different. A Dom owns a sub for the time they’re together, or during a scene, or in the bedroom. For a Master,” he paused, as if considering his words carefully. “The girl is mine. Period. No time limit. No off switch. And when a woman agrees to be mine, she’s placing her heart in my hands and trusting that I’ll keep it safe. In return, I provide for her, I protect her, I control her pleasure, but I also give her pain and demand she take it for me.” His eyes darkened, she could almost see the sadism rising in them. “I take a lot, but I give more. There is no stronger bond. Not marriage, not fancy words or vows, not rings or matching tattoos . . . Nothing.”
Words swirled in her mind, causing a torrent of emotions. Being c
ontrolled and forced to take pain prickled at her inner feminist. Protection, trust, and admiration sounded perfect, but owning and mastering weren’t for her. Not only because trusting someone that implicitly seemed dangerous and unhealthy, but also that she just wasn’t into servitude. Fetching slippers, eating off the floor, following orders twenty-four-seven . . . She’d rather die an old spinster with an oversized collection of cat figurines than live at someone’s beck and call.
She sighed. “This is frustrating. Maybe I’m in over my head.”
“No. I think you just need someone to train you.”
She grimaced.
Chuckling, he added, “Someone very patient.”
“What about you?”
His brows shot up. “Me? I told you, I’m looking for a slave.”
“But yesterday you said you’d give me tips. Maybe we take this a step further and you,” the word was difficult to get out, “train me. Teach me what Doms want so I don’t keep ruining my chances.” Though, sucking knowledge from him wasn’t fair without offering something in return. “I could pay you,” she added, shrugging. “Or something.”
He scowled at her. “I’m not something that can be bought.”
“Oh.” Right. Idiot. She hated when men treated her like a cheap object, and she’d just done that to him.
“No. I mean I wouldn’t take your money. The idea isn’t bad though. I can teach you to submit while introducing you to some of my friends and making sure you don’t get yourself into trouble.”
Her gaze shot to his. “Really? You’d do that?”
“Yes, but you have to listen to me. When we’re together, you’re mine. You try your best, and you learn. You sure you want to do this?”
Was she? He’d take this seriously, she knew that already. Training. Like a dog. It left a nasty taste in her mouth. How could such a cool guy like Banner want that in a woman? But if she had to put up with a bit, in order to experiment with a skilled Dom, then she’d do it.
“Yes, but I have limits.”
“Of course. I do too. That’s what the list is for.”
“You have limits?”
“What? Because I’m a Dom I’m not allowed to have things I don’t want to do?” He tilted his head. “I’m a person first, Kate.”
