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“The easy way sounds good, but it’s never really been my way of doing things.”
“Maybe this is the universe’s way of making up for the rest of your life.”
Was Church including himself in that? Severin hoped not. “The rest of my life wasn’t so bad, man. Not after five. I had people who loved me, food in my belly, a roof over my head. Some people aren’t so lucky.”
Church whistled. “Wow.”
“What?”
“Who are you and where’s my brother?”
“The dick?”
“The dick.”
“He’s gone.”
“What happened to him?”
Severin sighed and stretched his legs before letting his booted feet drop heavily back to the floor. “I think it’s a tossup between them and Loïc. I was dwelling on the wrong fucking shit. I thought things would have been different if Martine kept me. I was right. They would have been. Loïc had it way
fucking worse than I ever did.”
“No shit?”
“No shit. Sometimes you have no idea how lucky you are when your wishes don’t come true.” He pet the dog – Montgomery – trying to convince him to give up his slobbering assault on his elbow, only to have the mutt start rubbing his neck on the top of Severin’s head. He sat up and ran a hand through his hair, finding some of it just as damp as his elbow.
There was a sound like a sigh from the other end of the phone.
“Everything good with Ilse and the kids?”
“Yeah.”
Severin could feel something wasn’t right, though. They’d been alone together so much in life that sometimes he knew Church better than he knew himself.
“What is it then?”
Church snorted. “It’s stupid.”
“Tell me.”
“I’m fucking jealous.” Church barked a self-conscious laugh. “I’m so fucking happy you’re not alone, but your biological brother has just kind of...slid in there and taken my place.”
“No. It’s not like that.” Loïc was a nice kid, but he couldn’t replace his brother. Church was the one who had been there for him when he was a child and too angry to talk – who taught him to read and to trust. He was the one who stole cookies from the kitchen with Severin, and got up early with him to watch cartoons. Their boyhood tree forts and swimming adventures could never be replaced by a stranger. “You and I share memories no one else was there for.”
“Yeah.” Church’s deep voice was hoarse. “You seem so at peace now. I wish our moms could see you.”
“See me? I look the same.”
“Then tell Minnow to give you a fucking haircut, already! At Christmas you looked like the kind of guy who has bodies buried in the basement.”
Severin chuckled. He thought it was quiet enough, but some of the sound must have reached Church.
“Okay, you laughing is officially freaking me out. I’m going to go now. Tell the real Severin to call me when he gets in, and tell him he really needs to hire more believable replacements if he’s trying to get out of talking to me.”
“Bye, dickhead.”
“Okay, that’s more true to character, but it’s too little too late. I’m still not buying it.” Church’s voice warmed, “I love you, Sev.”
