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“You scared me.”
“I didn’t mean to. This was posted first, and then I let myself in when you didn’t respond.”
“You’ve got a key to my apartment?”
“I arranged for you to be here,” he said.
“Of course you did.” It should have been good to see him, but at that moment, I was so angry. He’d broken into my apartment, was sitting on my furniture, and I was supposed to be grateful for that?
I wasn’t.
I was angry. Totally angry.
He was alive, which also made me really happy, but this man had abandoned me. Had told me he was done with me. He’d gotten bored with me, and now I was supposed to what? Be happy to see him?
“What is this?” I asked.
He leaned forward, and I saw parts of his hands were bandaged. “This is me turning over a new leaf.”
I groaned. “I’m not going to have this conversation with you in the dark.” There was no reason to be afraid. I stood, went to the light, and flicked it on.
Still, he sat here. He blinked a few times, adjusting to the light.
He was here, in my living room. Talking to me.
My mouth went dry.
“Where were you?” he asked.
“You don’t get to ask me any questions.” I wanted him to stay silent so for a short time, I could just look at him and try to understand what was happening right now.
Tonight, I’d found out I was pregnant with this man’s baby, sat in a pub, didn’t drink a single drop of beer, came home, and discovered him here.
“Why are you here?” I asked.
“I came back for you.”
I shook my head. “No, you let me go, remember? You’d grown bored. You had enough of me.”
“Why is it so easy for you to believe the lies I fed you but you can’t accept the truth?”
I ran fingers through my hair. “You wanted me gone.”
“I had to have you gone.” He got to his feet and took a few steps toward me.
I held my hand up. “No! You don’t get to come here to my carefully organized world and be a part of it. You made your choice. You had your fun. I’m not a virgin anymore, Earl.”
“You think I give a fuck about your virginity?”
“You cared enough to want to take it!” I slammed my foot down. I didn’t care how childish I might look. He wasn’t going to get away with this. I refused to let him.
“Ashley, this isn’t about your virginity. You read the article.”
“So you’re trying to be a hero now?”
“I had to let you go. Your life was in danger. I wasn’t going to let you die because of me.”
“And what, now my life isn’t in danger?”
“The man who was going to hurt you is gone.”
“Gone?”
“Dead.”
“I can’t be hearing this stuff.” I turned on my heel, about to walk away. I released a scream as his arms wrapped around me. His face pressed against my neck.
I wanted to hate his touch.
The moment I felt him against me, I melted. Even as I screamed and tried to fight, my body submitted.
For a few blissful seconds, I allowed myself the chance to enjoy him. But it was only a few blissful seconds before the pain returned and there was no way I was going to let him get over this.
I yanked myself away from his arms, taking him by surprise with my fight. Spinning around, I slapped him hard across the face. I only did it once, and he looked at me in shock.
“You don’t get to come in here after what you did and pretend everything is okay. You hurt me, Earl.”
“I know. I’m going to do everything in my power to make it right, Ashley. I’m not going to leave. I won’t hurt you. I’ll give you your space, but I’m not going away. I’m here to stay, to be the man you deserve. The man you can fall in love with.”
He opened his jacket, and I watched as he removed a single red rose.
So beautiful.
I wanted to tell him to stay. To hold me. I needed to tell him I was pregnant.
I said nothing as he left my apartment.
The silence was deafening. I was alone.
The newspaper clipping was still in my hand.
I didn’t know what the fuck was going on anymore.
****
Earl
During the days, Ashley worked at a café. It was a small greasy spoon. Offered good old-fashioned traditional English breakfast, chips, and all the good stuff people seemed to enjoy. There was no smoking allowed on the premises, and signs were displayed for people to see.
I listened to a few grumbles, but no one complained.
Tea was served by the gallon in silver teapots, with little plastic tubs of milk and sachets of sugar for people to make their own drink.
It was charming.
Ashley came in around ten. She wore a pastel-pink uniform, no apron, and her was hair tied back. The women who were cooking had on hairnets. I sat in the corner. There were no booths, no privacy, and the tables were quite close together.
