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Customers turned to stare at me as I leaned against the railing and nibbled at the chicken. I didn’t care. I needed some fresh air, and I needed to eat.
“Ma’am?” A waiter approached me hesitantly. “Would you like a plate?”
“No, thank you,” I said politely. “This works just fine.”
He looked at me like I was a crazy person and nodded. “Sure. Okay. Enjoy, I guess.”
“Oh, I will.” Taking a large bite, I chewed until the chicken was practically liquid before I could swallow, although I wasn’t sure why I bothered. If I choked and died on this patio, at least I wouldn’t have to deal with the humiliation of facing Don again.
Or the pain of facing Brendan again.
Chasing the cold chicken with the wine, I took a deep breath. Brendan had made some good points. Should I come completely clean and tell Don about my previous marriage, about my current marital status, and most of all, about the kiss. I didn’t hide things from the men I dated, even if they were pissing me off. But could I trust him with the truth? Maybe use him to test the waters of public opinion? Maybe Danielle was right and nobody would even care about my past, and I was worried over nothing.
After I finally finished my chicken, I steeled myself for Don’s reaction for leaving the table so suddenly and walked back to the table. Although he smiled pleasantly at me, I could see the fury in his eyes. “You needed to powder your nose on the patio?”
“I prefer the natural light. Dim bathroom lights make it hard to see all the flaws,” I said lightly. “My dinner was delicious, by the way.”
“You are acting like a child, Jill. I don’t even recognize you anymore.”
“Don, how did you think this was going to go? You asked me to get all dressed up and take me to a nice dinner, and then you won’t even let me eat. What did you expect me to do?”
“Jill, you are going to need to get used to situations like this. As I am sure you have heard, there is a seat opening up on the board, and I am a strong contender. You should be pleased with this. I could be in a situation to help you, Jill. I know that your dissertation is weak, and I could make sure that certain doors open for you that might not otherwise be available.”
“My dissertation is not weak!” I snapped before I took a deep breath. This wasn’t how I wanted this conversation to go, but we were going to circle back around to the fact that Don, who’d only been encouraging before, now thought I wasn’t good enough. “Look, you’re right. I have been distracted. There’s something I need to tell you.”
“Perhaps you could let me finish my dinner with some peace and quiet. I have a feeling that you are going to introduce more drama into my life. I have to say, Jill, I am disappointed in you. I watched you for a couple of years before I chose you. I thought you were a quiet and serious woman.”
“Chose me?” I wrinkled my nose. “Chose me for what, exactly?”
“To be by my side, of course. Finish your wine. I think we’ll be skipping dessert.”
“What do you say we skip dessert?” Brendan’s gaze bored into mine as I finished the cheeseburger. The fast-food wrappers were still on the dashboard of his car, and the ninety-nine-cent hot-fudge sundaes were melting. He’d claimed that he’d made reservations at a swanky restaurant, but we hadn’t actually made it there.
I hadn’t even bothered to put on my panties as we dressed and headed to the local burger place for dinner. I couldn’t even remember the last time someone had made me scream like that. He was the first man who’d promised to rock my world and actually followed through.
Leaning across the console of his car, I dipped my finger in the ice cream and spread it across his lips. Licking them clean, I gave him a devilish smile. “I don’t skip dessert. Especially when I have a craving.”
“God, yes.” He dragged me over the console until I straddled him and scooped some ice cream on his fingers. Lifting my shirt, he swiped the cold cream over my nipples. I leaned back as he feasted and moaned.
“Jill! Did you hear a word I said?”
I gave myself a mental shake. “Yes. You want to skip dessert. I think that’s an excellent idea.” Trembling, I drained the rest of my wine. The faster this night was over, the better. I needed to do something that I hadn’t done in a long time.
This ache wasn’t going to go away, and since I couldn’t use Brendan to satisfy me and certainly couldn’t count on Don to do it, I was going to have to do it myself.
