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I brought my eye back up to meet Fox’s, who was standing next to me, his hard cock almost in my face, towel in the other. And then he did something odd, something I wasn’t expecting.
Something I also very much needed in that moment.
He got down, crouched, and started to wipe away around my eye, cleaning my face. As gentle as if he was a mother bird preening a chick. I tried to avoid his gaze, but my eyes were drawn to his like magnets. I couldn’t help it. The heat was still flickering inside me, threatening to ignite all over again. This was the most aroused I’d been in a long time, and it was all because of Gabriel “Fox” Morrison, the man who changed it all for me.
“Thank… thank you.” I stammered out as he stepped back, his big cock swinging as he moved. I was hypnotized. I wanted to taste, to lick, to suck.
And then it all hit me at once. Fox was a man. I was a man. I was straight.
I was supposed to be straight. I had lived my life thinking I’d end up with the fantasy fed to me since I was a kid: I’d have a beautiful wife with a white picket fence holding in our well-trained shepherd dog and two kids, a boy and a girl.
That’s what I had envisioned, what I was expecting.
Fox came in and drove a monster truck directly through that quaint little image, tearing it to shreds and forcing me to consider an entirely new reality.
This is one night. One drunken, emotional night. There’s nothing to reconsider.
I had to get to the bathroom. I needed to splash water on my face, and I needed a moment to myself. Regret was starting to show its wart-covered head. I was beginning to feel the short breaths that foreshadowed a panic attack. I hadn’t been hit by one in a while, but I guess getting jerked off by your new buddy/potentially first serious man crush tended to exacerbate anxiety problems.
I stood up, keeping myself from looking down at Fox’s huge rod, which was pointed at me like it was a compass Fox used to get around.
Fuck… I want him so damn bad.
“Um…” Now was my chance. He was looking at me, his hands at his side. His body was… wow. I thought I knew what sexy was, but I hadn’t… I had no idea what sexy was. Not until I saw sex-personified standing in front of me. I felt like I had been walking around with the lights off my entire life, and Fox had reached over and flipped on the switch.
He was perfect. Tall, broad, muscular without being intimidating. He had a few ridges of muscles where his abs rested, covered by a thin layer of soft, dark hair, which got thicker and thicker as my eyes traveled south. He had a pair of V muscles that cut down his hip, aiming my gaze at the object of my intense desire and fascination.
“I’m, uh, I need to go to the bathroom.” I left for the sanctuary of Fox’s bathroom without another word. Inside, I closed the door, locked it, turned the water on, looked at myself in the toothpaste-dotted mirror, and mouthed “what the fuck” over and over and over again.
When that was done, I proceeded to splash the prescribed water over my face. I grabbed one of the soft white hand towels Fox had hanging on a silver ring by the sink and pressed it against my face.
It smells exactly like him.
Sweet. A scent I didn’t want to let go of. Like a freakazoid, I covered my face and took in a deep whiff.
I’m losing my mind. This is crazy.
I let the towel drop. Back in the mirror, my reflection looked a little more lively, my cheeks a little more pink.
I had panicked. It was dumb, I was being dumb, but I couldn’t help it. This was a lot of fucking crap to unpack. This was the first night I had as a single man in a long time, and I spent it acting out one of the deepest, most erotic fantasies I’ve ever had.
And I had no idea what to think about it.
Did I love it? Of course I fucking loved it. Did I want to do it again? I wish Fox and I had never stopped.
Did any of this make me gay?
Now there was the million-dollar question.
If this were only a one-night thing, something that sparked out of some random circumstances and heavy drinks and nothing else, then I’d answer with a flat no. I think everyone had more than a right to experiment consensually with whoever they wanted and not have to be labeled from that experience.
But… well, this wasn’t something random or fleeting. This had come from thoughts I had been suppressing for years. From countless nights in my dark bedroom, gay porn pulled up on my laptop, my face lit up by the screen, the guys in the video doing things that made my cheeks red and my dick leak.
