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I was awoken by a gentle hand on my face. "Zach, I need to clean and bandage your wound. I'm sorry, but it's probably going to hurt."
Poor Lucky seemed so distressed at the prospect, but I couldn't reassure him that I'd been through much worse than what was about to happen. I gave him a nod and let him roll me so he could have better access to my leg.
"I, um, have to take off your pants," Lucky said. I found myself smiling at his hesitation.
"Go for it," I responded.
If the process of trying to get my pants off hadn't been so painful for me, I would have enjoyed having Lucky undress me. It was all I could do not to respond when he removed the tourniquet and pressed gauze to the wound. Lucky worked quickly and efficiently to clean and bandage the area, but I could see the worry in his eyes. There was no missing the tremble in his fingers as he secured the bandage around my thigh. I reached my hand down to cover his in the hopes that I could send him the reassurance he needed. He stilled and stared at our hands. I could see silent tears slipping down his cheeks.
"Lucky," I said softly. He lifted his eyes to mine.
"I can't stop it. The bleeding, it's slower now but it won't stop. I don't know how to make it stop." His concern for me was heartbreaking, and I wished with every fiber of my being that I could take away his pain. It was proof that even though I’d treated him so terribly after our night together, he still cared about me. No matter how many times I told him I wasn't worth it, it hadn't changed anything.
"Come here, baby," I whispered. I opened the blanket so he could join me beneath it.
"No, I have to get a fire started and then see if I can find some food because I only have one protein bar, and we’re almost out of water—"
"Lucky, come here," I said more firmly this time. The demand in my voice had him freezing in place. He looked at me longingly and it was the first time I'd seen any sign of relief in his expression. This time, he didn't argue as he moved to join me underneath the blanket. He was careful not to jostle my leg as he settled down next to me. He was stiff and tense as he lay flat on his back next to me, refusing to make eye contact. As tired as I was, I still managed to pull him against me and wrap my arms around him. The move seemed to release something for him because he buried his nose against my neck and clung to me as if I were the only thing keeping him afloat in a turbulent river.
His body felt cold against mine, but the blanket and my own body did their job and soon the violent tremors that had consumed Lucky's small frame eased. I gave in to my own exhaustion and finally closed my eyes.
Chapter 24
Lucky
If I'd been fully asleep, it would've been a disaster in the making. As it was, my fear for Zach, along with the cold wind and rain that was seeping through the broken-out windows of the warming hut as a thunderstorm passed overhead, was keeping me from finding any kind of peace in slumber. The fact that I was pressed up against Zach's body helped considerably because I was immediately aware of it when he began to whimper and moan. I was in the process of getting ready to shake him awake from whatever nightmare he was experiencing when I heard him whisper, "Teller, check your six." Right after he said the words, Zach let out a harsh yell and his hands began to jerk at his sides.
I quickly released him and scrambled away from his jerking body because I knew what was happening. Zach was in the midst of another PTSD episode. I stood there helplessly watching Zach's body thrash like he was fighting off some unknown attacker. I wanted to intervene but knew if he got his hands on me, even in his weakened state, he could potentially hurt me. If that happened, there was no way to get off this mountain alive. Not to mention the guilt he’d feel.
"Zach," I called, keeping my voice as even as I could.
Zach's eyes were open as he scrambled to his knees. His hand was fisted like he was holding something in it, but nothing was there. His eyes flew wildly around the darkened warming hut, but I couldn't make out his expression. I moved quickly and quietly to get my phone out of my pocket. While the thing was useless because there was no reception this high up, I’d purposely kept it on me so I'd easily have access to light to check Zach's wound throughout the night.
